


You spill my heart for you

by Light_Voltage (MistRunner)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, PistilStamen!AU, flower!au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-20 15:55:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14264484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistRunner/pseuds/Light_Voltage
Summary: [Pistil/Stamen!AU] Baekhyun is what you might call a 'latebloomer'. On his search to find the one person that can make his cherry blossoms bloom, he realises that he wouldn't have had to venture this far.





	1. Prelude

**Author's Note:**

> [Explanations]
> 
> >The AU: Pistil/Stamen AU is not really popular in the international fandom, but more known in the korean fanfic fandom. Even there, it is very rare so I hope to expand the knowledge about this beautiful trope. In a way it has great similarities with the A/B/O trope. Stamen, which embody the 'male part' of the flower are like Alphas or Betas, however, in my interpreation they switch their roles in bed to their heart's content. I'm not sure how the Korean way sees this, to be honest. Pistils equal the role of the Omegas in this trope and represent the 'female part' of the flower (These terms are meant scientifical, I do not mean to imply that relationships should have a female and a male role). They can self-lubricate due to the production of stigmatic fluid and give off a very alluring scent to stamen. The big difference is that they have flowers on their skin that bloom once they get aroused and reach their orgasms. 
> 
> >Pistil: Self-lubricating, with alluring scents from their flowers which literally grow on or around them/.(A pistil only has one flower, for example, yellow roses)  
> There are poisonous pistils. If you have unprotected sex with them you are bound to them, meaning if the stamen has sex with someone else and releases in them they die. 
> 
> >Stamen: Their scents are not as prominent as pistils' as they do not grow flowers on their skin but have a tattoo of their specific flower/tree/plant in general. 
> 
>  
> 
>                                                                          The Characters:  
>                                                                      
>                                   Byun Baekhyun, 23 years old, literature student, cherry blossom stamen
> 
>                                   Kim Jongdae, 23 years old, photography student, magnolia stamen
> 
>                            
> 
>                                  Park Chanyeol, 23 years old, stamen
> 
>                                  Do Kyungsoo, 23 years old, pistil
> 
>                                  Oh Sehun, hibiscus stamen 
> 
>  
> 
> Disclaimer 1:  
> This is not stolen/copied from anyone else who wrote Stamen/Pistil!AU. As it is a trope, I am free to use the topic for my own works as well.  
> Thank you.
> 
> Disclaimer 2:  
> The wonderful cover was made by lysandercrow from summer breeze multi shop!

 

_For R.  
With the help of my other half L._

 

**> You spill my heart for you<**

_\- the prelude-_

Kim Jongdae really doesn’t know why he is here.  
Why he is going through the whole torture again.  
  
It’s not like he doesn’t know any better; he knows the outcome of this repetitive ordeal. Because ever since the first time, it had been the same.  
Over and over again, it had been a vicious cycle from which the brunet couldn’t escape. Once you are dragged into the vortex of those damn ‘ _pretty please_ ’s, there is no way out.

But that’s what best friends do, right?  
Best friends don’t say no, they do not deny you any request and they support you in any way they can. They help you to overcome a crisis, brush away your hair while you’re busy emptying your stomach over a toilet bowl, and tell you that you look like shit right after.  
That’s what best friends are for.  
  
A best friend, like Jongdae is, answers Baekhyun’s call in the middle of the night because the latter is bereft of any ideas concerning his essay for his “ _Meloville and the radical imaginary_ ” class.  
And that despite the fact that the younger neither knows who that Meloville guy was nor understands what exactly a ‘radical imaginary’ should be.  
Perhaps the secret fantasies he envisions about the pink-haired male’s thighs, and those damn hands, could be called radical.  
Though _downright scandalous_ sounded way more fitting.  
Jongdae would be the perfect protagonist for a “The _Victorians and the hidden self_ ” research paper.  
The fact that he had memorised Baekhyun’s English Literature classes better than his own escapes his mind for the time being.

When he looks back up, when the loud music of the club they are currently in booms through his ears again on high volume, he flinches, but it’s not because of the loud sound that threatens to perforate his eardrums, no.  
His dark eyes catch sight of something that really shouldn’t surprise him as it doesn’t come unexpectedly at all.  
It’s not the first time that he witnesses it.

It’s not.  
  
He has watched Byun Baekhyun flirt with countless of people before, in fact, Jongdae had lost count of the number of people his best friend has made eyes at.  
But that doesn’t change the fact that it hurts every time again.

To watch how Baekhyun smiles at pretty pistils to entice them and pull them in, how he bats his long eyelashes at tall stamens to get a free drink and _a ride_ home.

Jongdae averts his eyes when he feels his white buds tingle at the thought of being the one to take his best friend home. To be the one Baekhyun directs those smiles at. Hold him close with his arm around his waist while they enjoy a night out at a club or bar.  
The brunet feels his tattoo prickle in sheer jealousy as he can’t help but look up again just in time to watch the older stamen sling an arm around that pistil boy’s neck.  
He dully notes that the other male is far taller than the both of them, and wonders for a moment what his best friend wants with a giant peach boy underneath him.  
But at the mental image of the pink-haired stamen and that pistil gardening together Jongdae feels his throat tighten, and the urge to puke rises in his stomach.

And he really, _really_ wants to look away, yet he finds himself frozen in place.  
His hazel eyes drinking in everything, from the way Baekhyun’s hand travels over a toned back to the elder’s eyes that light up at the prospect of a night spend in a pleasant oblivion.  
They are filled with hope.  
Hoping that this time Baekhyun’s tattoo would finally grow and flourish during…

Jongdae finally manages to close his eyes, to drown out the images that threaten to overtake his mind.  
The younger dreads the mornings that follow nights like these. He never finds sleep after coming home, never having enough alcohol in his system to calm down his stuttering heart.  
His mind not clouded enough to shut out the feeling of his trembling florets. Jongdae stays awake then, watching the ceiling above him, too scared of the next morning.  
Too scared that Baekhyun will call him after a particular night of unfolded bliss only to tell him that finally, _finally_ his days as a baby bud are over.

That someone had managed to make his best friend’s tattoo come to life; had awakened those soft blossoms which are sleeping somewhere underneath his skin.  
Someone, who isn’t Jongdae.

Baekhyun is a cherry-blossom stamen. The elder’s tattoo is located just above his bum, on his lower back, where a fragile branch reaches its tips over the pink-haired male’s skin. Rich green leaves grow out of the branch, but not a single bud had formed in all those years.  
Baekhyun is a late-bloomer so to say, not really uncommon, but uncommon enough to be annoyed by it if you are the one concerned.  
And that was exactly the reason why the elder had started gardening early.  
In the hopes of accelerating his growth-phase and finally getting a fully developed stamen symbol.

To Jongdae, however, gardening is something much more precious. His own tattoo had spread over the years, during puberty, leaving his side and his shoulders decorated in refreshing green and brown colours. White little buds had formed, indicating his magnolia genes, but until now Jongdae hasn’t experienced them blossoming either.

In a way, Baekhyun and him are really similar. They were both waiting, they both wanted to find the one person who makes them burst and bloom.  
Only that they couldn’t be more different at the same time.  
  
Because Jongdae is waiting for that _one_ person in his life, that one person he wants to share a garden with, and Baekhyun just wants to end his seedling-hood for good.  
No matter who will be the one taking care of that.

While the younger’s magnolia tattoo had been growing steadily, his best friend’s had stayed the same size for as long as the brunet could remember. It barely covers his lower back and the only thing that had changed were the number of leaves sprouting from the branch.

To start gardening had sounded like the best solution to a young Byun Baekhyun back then and no matter how much Jongdae had tried to talk him out of it, his best friend had been stubborn as a goat and had ignored all warnings of ‘ _what if you garden with a venomous pistil? Then you are bound to her or him forever_ ’ because ‘ _Dae, are you for real, venomous Pistils don’t exist. They are just a way to scare little and gullible stamens like you_ ’. The younger had been too shocked to point out that he had always been taller than Baekhyun by half an inch and that if someone was the little one out of the two it would be the elder himself.

Jongdae remembers not sleeping that night when they had been barely sixteen, too worried for his best friend who had thrown himself out there to be taken to bed by whomever.  
He also remembers the call he had received after Baekhyun’s first adventure, remembers the sobs he had heard as the elder told him that nothing had changed.  
The pink-haired boy was still un-blooming.  
His tattoo hadn’t spread, no flowers had formed, and not even the sign of a small bud was to be found. No overwhelming fragrance that is supposed to allure other sexual partners.  
Nothing.

Jongdae had held his best friend that night after the disastrous end of Baekhyun’s first encounter.  
He had kissed his forehead gently, and told him that once he finds the right garden where he belongs, he will be the most pretty of them all.  
The most enticing, standing in full bloom and making everyone else jealous with his soft, pink florets.  
His best friend had clung to him, had shed so many tears into the younger’s chest as he nodded.  
One day.

The next morning had the brunet taken a shower and had watched with fearful eyes as the first white buds formed between his green branches. How they had slowly made their way to stand out from underneath all the leaves decorating his skin, brimming with an emotion Jongdae wanted to avoid at all costs.

That day, he knew he was doomed.

He comes back to reality when his and Baekhyun’s eyes meet through the crowd of people.  
A wink is sent in his direction, followed by a nearly unnoticeable wave of goodbye and then his best friend vanishes out of the club.  
With the tall excuse of a pistil of course, their hands already dangerously close to certain body parts that are not meant to be groped in public.

Jongdae stays rooted for another minute or two, feels how his Magnolias itch all over, feels how his heart beats slower and slower as if it wants to stop all together.

It’s the familiar feeling of being watered with ice, but it takes his breath away every time anew.

His phone screen lights up with a short message of ‘ _C U tmr, Dae, take care_ ’, and the brunet feels how his chest tightens, how an invisible force is tugging at his heart as if it was weed that needed to be gone.

He ignores the text his best friend had sent him and opens the chat room with another person. Jongdae can barely read the letters forming the name of his friend, but he starts typing nonetheless.  
>He left again. Ridiculously tall peach pistil. I’m at the Hesperides<

The brunet doesn’t have to wait for long, keeps on looking at the screen without really seeing anything till a new message arrives and that lets him sigh in relief.  
>Yeol will get you<

>Thanks<

\--

He doesn’t even know when the tears had started flowing.

 If it had been when Baekhyun had left his seat next to Jongdae’s to tail after the black haired pistil boy who had caught the elder’s eye or, perhaps, when he had watched them interact right after.  
Had witnessed smiles getting exchanged, drinks being ordered and bodies being pressed close.  
  


Had it been the strong scent of fruits that had pulled the elder in? The sweet fragrance of peach-flowers around the tall man? It had been so prominent that the brunet could smell it all the way to his seat at the bar where Baekhyun had left his half empty drink.  
  
Jongdae doesn’t know, because he is not able to comprehend what the other sees, or more like smells, in the taller male.  
A club or a bar, it doesn’t really matter for the brunet, is like a botanic garden, scents mixing up and overlying one another. To be completely honest, Jongdae can’t tell apart most fragrances, but when it comes to his best friend, when it comes to Baekhyun’s unique scent, the younger is able to detect it anywhere.  
No matter how many flashing lilies stand in between them, to Jongdae there is only the scent of a mellow green aroma with hints of shy roses.  
Baekhyun’s fragrance.

  
No matter how faint it is, how easily overruled by tacky hyacinths, Jongdae finds it the most alluring of them all.  
Yet, it’s not like Jongdae hadn’t gotten any invitations. There had been many, as soon as the other stamen leaves his side and gives way to any suitor who wants to try his luck.  
But none of them had been the one Jongdae is looking for.  
He doesn’t want to share or build a garden with any of them.  
They aren’t Baekhyun after all; their scents being far more prominent, far more promising, but only the smell of earthy roses cause his heart to skip a beat.

_Le coeur veux ce que l’esprit rejette;_  
Jongdae wants.  
He never gets.

He only watches with defeat in his eyes.

“Dae”, his head snaps back up when he hears his tall friend’s voice breaking the silence of their car ride.  
They had arrived at the brunet’s apartment complex, after Jongdae had declined an invitation to sleep over at Kyungsoo’s and Chanyeol’s place.  
He really doesn’t like intruding on the couple’s life.

“I’m okay”, he smiles and knows that he shouldn’t lie to his friends, but they probably see right through him anyway.  
They always had.

  
“You’re not”, the taller answers, all deep voice and worried glances  
Of course, not even Chanyeol buys his lies

“Does it matter?”  
“Kim Jongdae”, the younger is definitely outraged by now  
“Of course it bloody matters”, he starts to lecture the brunet, but Jongdae stops him with a raised hand  
“I don’t wanna talk about it”, he whispers with a sense of finality and opens the car’s door  
“Thanks for giving me a lift”  
He doesn’t meet Chanyeol’s eyes.

Doesn’t want to be faced with pity.  
He can cope.

It’s not like this is the first time.  
It’s not like he hadn’t known that he would end up like this.  
Not wasted enough to faint, yet not sober enough to stay rational about it either.

“Breakfast tomorrow? Usual place?”, he hears the stamen ask through an opened window and he nods, only to take the worry out of his friend’s knitted brows  
“Fine”

It is going to be fine.  
He is going to be fine.  
Just like every time he leaves with Baekhyun for a club.  
A pub, a bar, name it, they had been there.  
  


Apparently, it is to find someone for Jongdae, or so Baekhyun had claimed.  
His dear best friend just can’t watch him go on as a virgin anymore and had taken it upon himself to take him out to find someone that suits his gardening style.

Only that each time they go out together, it was Baekhyun who doesn’t go home alone.  
And it was Jongdae who is left to watch after the one guy that he wouldn’t mind making seeds with.

\--

“I swear by fucking god if I _ever_ get my hands on his neck, he is done for”  
A vein is pulsing on Kyungsoo’s forehead and both Chanyeol and Jongdae are a little concerned that it might pop very soon.  
The sole mention of the pink-haired stamen’s name gets the pistil’s blood pressure soaring way past the healthy 120.

“Soo, please”, the tallest of their group tries to calm down his lover, bringing their hands together underneath the table while rubbing soothing circles with his thumb  
“ You’ll get wrinkles if you keep on frowning”, Chanyeol tries to lift the mood with his excuse of a joke, but miraculously it seems to work.  
A loud growl escapes the youngest, and the black haired pistil takes his cup of coffee with his free hand, sipping on the bitter beverage to occupy himself with something that is not cursing the existence of Byun Baekhyun and any child he may produce.  
His other hand stays clasped together with Chanyeol’s and Jongdae has to smile a little at the big grin the silver haired is wearing.  
_They are good together_ , he muses but wonders yet again how these two managed to end up as a couple. To any outsider they must seem like a mismatched pair of puzzle pieces, but once you take a closer look one realises that they fit just fine.  
With all their curves and their edges.

 “I just don’t get it”, Kyungsoo continues despite the firm squeeze on his hand.  
The raven haired seems really bothered by the issue and Jongdae feels grateful to his friend that something like that, something that actually just concerns the brunet himself, gets the smallest member of their circle of friends so worked up. It makes him feel important, cherished.  
It feels nice, the stamen concludes as he watches Kyungsoo lift his eyebrows again, wrinkles be damned.

  
“They are best friends. He is bound to notice something? How can he not realise that his own best bud is drooling after his ass for how many years? Ever since Jongdae here was a pre-mature seedling!”

The brunet chuckles at the outburst of his younger friend and leans his head against his palm, his elbow propped up to support the weight.  
A deep sigh leaves his throat, but he feels more at ease.  
Around his two friends, who had known about his feelings for the elder stamen since forever, since they had known each other because _yes_ , it had been this long already, he feels… lighter?  
  
He can forget for a while and if he crumbles, there are two people who gladly catch him on his way down.  
They had caught on easily, simply because they were not as…dense and thick-headed as some other pink-haired male he knows.  
He remembers the first time he had introduced them to Baekhyun, a typical ‘meet the best friend’-night out at a small cosy pub, and knows that he will never forget the way Kyungsoo had seized him up after the eldest had left to get them their drinks.  
It had taken the pistil exactly 2 minutes and 14 seconds to look through Jongdae, yet here he is, year 13 with his best friend Byun Baekhyun and nothing had changed.  
Nevertheless, the brunet likes the elder the way he is.  
 A little airheaded, but even more genuine.

“I don’t know, Soo”, the brunet hums and swirls his spoon around in his latte as he decides to not wallow in any more self-pity for the day.  
“It’s not like I’m subtle about checking out his _thighs_. Not his butt, just saying”

  
Kyungsoo once again raises his eyebrows at this and Jongdae relents.  
“Okay. His thighs and his butt”  
The black haired pistil shrugs, hiding a small grin of ‘ _I knew it_ ’ as he drinks up the last remnants of his coffee, his head leaning against his lover’s shoulder  
“You can’t blame me, have you seen how plump they are?”, Jongdae grins brightly and continues on just because  
“ Chanyeol, I’m sure you understand, right? Soo has nice thighs, too”  
But before the silver-haired stamen can open his mouth to retort and indulge in the wonderful topic of firm limbs does Kyungsoo stop him with a glare

“I’m only saying this once, Park Chanyeol. One word, only one, and you can self-garden for the next month”  
That leaves the tallest with a gaping mouth and a whine of protest, but other than that it shuts him up successfully.

Jongdae smiles, the corners of his lips pulling up with sincerity.  
Around his friends, everything was a little better.  
He felt happy and enjoyed the feeling of his buds not quivering in yearning, but tingling in joy when his thoughts drifted off to the elder stamen and his broad grin. And how once again, he had not received the one message he was dreading.  
Once again his screen stayed dark; no ‘ _it happened_ ’ flashing up.

**A/N:**  
This much for the prelude! The rest of the story will be in Baekhyun's P.O.V  
How did you like it?  
Any questions regarding this AU? Just message me! :)

 

XOXO, Voltage


	2. Hibiscus

 

„Come on, Dae“, Baekhyun whines as Jongdae doesn’t seem to give in.  
It had been days, weeks even since they last went out!

“Baek, I really have to finish this project for ‘light and shades’ class until the day after tomorrow, okay?”, the younger reasons and the elder knows he is right.  
The cherry blossom stamen should be working on that essay for his ‘early French Poetry’ class himself, but it isn’t like he really cares right now  
“Please, Dae. Pleaseee, you know I’m making those puppy eyes you can’t resist!”  
He also adds a pout for good measure, but he is well aware that the younger can’t see.  
All he gets in response is a sigh and Baekhyun refuses to accept that he has lost a battle.

He never loses a battle.

“No. I’m not in the mood to watch you flirting with strangers to get some pollination action”  
Baekhyun shudders immediately when the weird word reaches his ears.  
He makes a face and retching sounds before he replies  
“Oh my god, Jongdae! Can you say a more horrible word than the p-word?”  
Baekhyun gets goosebumps from it and if anyone would ever utter it during actual gardening would he probably throw out.  
Jongdae has always been more rational about it though.  
Not as sensitive.

“Fecundation?”  
“Kim Jongdae”, Baekhyun swears he nearly puked  
“That was a rhetorical question, why would you answer that, just ungh!”  
“To make you miserable?”  
The elder feels the desperate need to jump through their mobile phones to strangle the brunet on the other end, but he sees his chance in this more than horrendous conversation.

“And as an apology, will you go to ‘The Ivy Tendril’ with me. And I promise, this time it’s about you. I won’t suddenly leave. I promise. Best friend and bro-mise, okay?”, he wiggles his eyebrows and knows he has won.  
As always.  
Byun Baekhyun doesn’t lose to Kim Jongdae.  
  
But he means it. His dear friend had been single for all these years, had never even considered going out and flashing those pretty and pale magnolia buds at anyone.  
And as his best friend, that is something the pink haired stamen can’t accept.  
Jongdae is far too precious to end up all alone and withered.

There is a sigh followed up by a small ‘ _okay_ ’.  
The connection is broken a moment later and Baekhyun jumps to his feet and walks over to his closet.

His phone buzzes a moment later and the stamen is actually surprised to see Kyungsoo’s name flash up instead of Jongdae’s.  
The pistil rarely messages him.  
It is either something about Jongdae or a question about Chanyeol and what the tallest of their group of friends is thinking when he can’t seem to find the right words around the youngest.  
Are they even his friends?  
Baekhyun usually believes so, when in reality they are far closer to the younger stamen than to him.

>You are forcing Jongdae to go out with you again?<  
The stamen pulls up his eyebrows at this.  
What is that supposed to mean?

>I’m not forcing him, it’s for his own good. He is 23 years old and has never gardened!<  
And as his best friend it is his job to look after the other’s…health.  
That is only natural!

He gets a vacuous >…< as a reply but he is already used to that.  
Kyungsoo only uses words when he finds them necessary and it’s not like he can change Baekhyun’s opinion.  
The elder chooses to ignore the last text and gets ready for their night out. Not everyone can be as lucky as the smallest, who was practically ran over by his current lover Park Chanyeol.  
Not everyone finds the perfect match that easily.  
For some, the search takes longer and sometimes the journey seems endless.  
Baekhyun isn’t any different from that.  
  
But today, he needs to be a good wingman and finally find someone suitable enough for his best friend’s flower bed.

\--

All in all, the night out is fun.  
Baekhyun always enjoys his best-friend-dates, because frankly Jongdae is the best company you can get.  
The brunet never fails to make him laugh, but latest at their third Bacardi or vodka coke everything is funny to the elder anyway.  
Baekhyun isn’t a heavy drinker, but he never says no when a drink is offered to him by a handsome stamen or a pretty pistil.  
It’s an easy way to break the ice, he concludes, and it usually gets him what he wants.

But today is different, he had promised so.  
So he sticks to the rules and never leaves Jongdae’s side.  
Safe from when they go to the restrooms, of course.  
He shares everything with the younger, but that would surely be a little over the top, thank you very much.

“You’re not even trying”, Baekhyun complains for the umpteenth time that evening.  
“What are you talking about?”, the brunet answers with a look of confusion all over his face and the pink haired stamen just groans in frustration  
“Are you seriously that blind?”  
Baekhyun rubs his temples to get rid of the slowly developing headache.  
“He asked you if he could buy you a drink. He was trying to flirt with you, Dae.”  
He knew that the younger is still green in that department, but he couldn’t seriously be that oblivious to such attempts right?

“But you offered to buy me a drink a minute ago, why would I need another drink?”, Jongdae whines and shows his best pout and Baekhyun wonders yet again how they could be so similar and so different at the same time.

“Kim Jongdae”, he sighs and puts his hands on the slightly taller’s shoulders  
“Next time just accept the drink okay? He looked nice enough, maybe he would have been your type!”  
But Jongdae only shrugs as a response and they make their way back to their seats.  
The club is crowded and they have to scream to understand each other, but the pink haired could never lose the other in a crowd.  
Jongdae’s magnolia scent was far too outstanding for him.

“You’re going to be the death of me”, he complains as the younger was obviously not interested in any of the suitors that approach him.  
“I heard that, Byun Baekhyun”  
Said male offered a broad smile in return to quench the brunet’s anger and soon enough Jongdae lowers his drawn up eyebrows.

“You still owe me a drink!”, the younger stamen screams over the loud music and crosses his arms to emphasise his statement and Baekhyun knows he will give in.  
It’s not like Jongdae isn’t right, the elder had just hoped that the brunet would accept an invitation of a possible flirting partner first.

“Fine, fine, let’s go back to the bar then if you’re so keen on-“, but he freezes, stopping mid-sentence as he catches a glimpse of someone he had hoped to never see again.

  
It’s the pretty pistil girl he had dated for a short while, before he realised that she is a control freak and more than just a little possessive.  
She had apparently come to the club with some of her friends and the stamen fears they are coming their way so his brain practically short-circuits.  
He doesn’t want her to see him or at least does he not want to seem available and single to her so he does the only thing that comes to his mind.  
He grabs Jongdae’s collar, drowns out the sputtered noises of confusion from the younger and pulls him closer.  
Without further ado and in fear that he isn’t acting fast enough he leans against the wall behind them and presses his lips to his best friend’s.  
There is a growl of protest, but he manages to swallow it with a louder hum of his own.

He doesn’t even realise that he is kissing his best friend, doesn’t take notice of the mixed smell that is suddenly enveloping them.  
Fresh citrus scented roses, the concoction of their combined scents that has them moaning out into each other’s mouths as the innocent peck turns into an open mouthed french kiss.

His cherry blossom branch suddenly throbs underneath his shirt and it causes him to pull away.  
Jongdae’s eyes are wide and their breath is coming irregular as Baekhyun’s arms slide of the other’s neck.  
When had he?

He comes back to his senses and focuses on his best friend again, who looks at him with brown orbs full of shock and something Baekhyun has never seen before.  
The elder knows he needs to explain himself or their friendship could be ruined forever.

He opens his mouth to speak, but his lips are still tingling from the heated kiss they had shared.  
Baekhyun had aimed for a peck or two not for a mess of tongues.  
The elder just hopes Jongdae won’t ask why his plan had escalated like that, because frankly speaking he doesn’t have an explanation either.

The pink haired stamen does what he does best.  
He laughs.  
Baekhyun nudges Jongdae’s shoulder and grins.  
“Thanks Dae, that was a close call”, he starts  
“You remember Nari? She was about to come here and I really didn’t want her to see me all sexy free and single”, the elder snickers and waits for Jongdae to join in, but he doesn’t.

Instead, he is rooted to the spot, his eyes still wide.  
Is he that shocked? Maybe he feels awkward now?  
“Sorry”, Baekhyun whispers and entwines their hands together.  
“I didn’t want to use you like that. I just… I wasn’t thinking, okay? But thank you so much for the bro-job”, he smiles a little and finally Jongdae nods at least.  
He squeezes the younger’s palm in reassurance.  
Baekhyun feels bad now, taking the other by surprise like this.

“You’re the best”, he smiles and nudges the brunet again.  
“It’s okay, Baek”, his best friend looks at him and he sees uncertainty glittering in the warm, brown orbs which tells him that he needs to do something to emphasise how sorry he is about this awkward situation  
  
“You know what!”  
“What?”, Jongdae speaks up and offers a little smile back.  
They are okay right?  
They always are.  
A bro-job doesn’t destroy friendships.

“As an apology I’m going to buy you this huge ass cocktail with the millions of fruits you’ve always wanted, okay?”  
Baekhyun doesn’t wait for the younger’s reply.  
Jongdae has been whining about that cocktail for months.  
They had no idea what it actually is, the name too foreign to be pronounced, probably Russian or something, and the different fruits and juices only leave the conclusion that the thing will be colourful as a rainbow.  
It is quite pricey, but Baekhyun knows that now is the right time to actually listen to Jongdae’s complaints.

The bar is fairly deserted, which is good as it gives him the opportunity to order the fancy drink as soon as possible.  
He glances at the menu for a last time and murmurs a quick ‘one Raduga Royal please’ and hopes that his pronunciation had been at least half correct and that he won’t be presented with something entirely different.

“Hey”  
Baekhyun blinks as a handsome guy gets his attention.  
He can’t tell if he is a stamen or a pistil, but because of his sharp features he goes with stamen.  
“Yeah?”, he smiles back and bats his eyelashes out of habit.

The guy is handsome, overly attractive and under normal circumstances he wouldn’t have hesitated to openly flirt with the taller.  
But he had promised.  
“You look like you could need some company?”  
Baekhyun immediately understands that the taller stamen isn’t used to talking up other’s in clubs, like the ivy tendril, or bars.  
Maybe it’s his first time?

Baekhyun smiles and pays the bartender as he receives the indeed very colourful cocktail.  
“Sorry”, he says and really feels sorry for the handsome stamen.  
“I’m here with my best friend. I promised not to stray from my rightful path tonight”, he winks and luckily the guy chooses to chuckle  
“I see”, he offers and Baekhyun nods.

“Maybe next time?”, the taller asks before the smaller saunters off  
“Yeah, next time”, he answers and fully turns to walk back to his best friend’s side who was still standing where he left him.

Baekhyun smiles and is already curious about the other’s reaction to the enormous and colourful drink he had bought him, when he freezes.  
There is another boy at Jongdae’s side.  
Something stops him from coming closer and Baekhyun really doesn’t know what is stopping him.  
Maybe it’s the way he hears Jongdae’s loud laugh all the way over here?  
Over the loud music of the club?  
The way the orange haired guy is smiling at his best friend and seems to be listening to whatever Jongdae is telling him?  
Baekhyun’s feet finally set in motion and he walks a little closer, takes in the other’s smile as he looks at the male in front of him who is leaning impossible close now.  
He can tell by now that it’s a pistil Jongdae is flirting with.  
They are flirting aren’t they?  
You go into a club to flirt and drink and find a partner, so what else would they be doing?

There are small pink carnation buds littered on the boy’s exposed arms which indicated the other’s role.  
So Jongdae likes pistils?  
Why not.  
Stamen usually prefer to garden with pistils, as they are able to self-lubricate and give off a far more prominent scent than stamen to attract possible partners.  
But there is no rule with whom you are allowed to be or not.

Baekhyun doesn’t have a preference per se.  
He has had them all.  
Pistils riding him and stamen fucking him.  
It was all the same to Byun Baekhyun.

None of them had ever caused him to…  
None of them had woken up his dormant cherry blossoms.

Baekhyun had never bloomed in all his life despite his various sexual adventures. But at least…  
His eyes wandered back to his best friend who was still talking to the petite but definitely _taller_ pistil.  
  
At least Jongdae’s budding days would be over today.

He ignores the weird itch from his tattoo and smiles instead.  
Baekhyun has finally managed to make the younger find a partner.  
But if the pistil boy would be a one night thing or someone permanent is still out in the open.  
_That is Jongdae’s business_ , Baekhyun scolds himself.  
Not his.

“I don’t think you still need this?”, Baekhyun comes back to his senses and spots the same tall stamen from before  
“What?”, he answers with very eloquent articulation but doesn’t protest when the other takes the drink out of his hands.  
“Oh”  
The taller’s smile is pleasant to his eyes and it distracts him for now.  
He knows he is worryied for the younger, remembers his own first night better than anything else.  
How else should he explain the weird feeling in his chest?

It’s worry.  
For his best friend, about the night he will experience. That is the only reason why his gaze is still glued to Jongdae’s addicting smile and the reason for the bitter feeling simmering in his stomach.  
“Hey?”, the tall guy with the nice blonde hair gets his attention again and finally causes Baekhyun to tear his gaze away  
“Yeah?”, the smaller offers his best smile in return and lets the stamen wrap a bold arm around his narrow waist.  
Jongdae was taken care off so he was allowed to have some fun too, right?  
  
“Is now a good time?”  
Baekhyun shudders as the other had leaned down and breathed those words into his ear.  
The stamen’s words are hot and promising against his ear and he can only swallow and bite his bottom lip in anticipation and excitement.  
“Now is perfect”

\--

Baekhyun doesn’t remember how they end up at the other man’s place. He never does.  
It was not his priority to keep a track of things, no.  
The only thing that counts to him right now is that his shirt is being flung through the room and a hot tongue is trailing down his neck.  
He lets himself be pushed back against a bed, drops onto the surprisingly soft mattress and pulls the stamen boy on top of him  
“What’s your name?”, he breathes into the taller’s ear and sees a smirk flicker over the other’s features  
“I can be whoever you want me to be”, the blonde answers and Baekhyun wonders for a moment what that is supposed to mean.  
He really is not in the mood for any weird games right now, so he repeats his question to the other, moaning out when a hot tongue is swirled around his nipple

“Sehun”, the boy drawls out and brings his wet appendage back to the raven haired’s chest, kisses his way up, and finally bites down on a protruding collarbone.  
The smaller hisses, his back arching off the mattress for a split second before he drops back down and manages to shove the stamen boy to where he wants him to be.  
He had never been into extended foreplay.

“Eager, aren’t we? So keen on forgetting?”, Sehun’s voice’s deep, layered with evident arousal as he willingly travels lower, drags his tongue over the flat planes of Baekhyun’s stomach, and leaves small kisses in his wake.  
“Forgetting what?”, the smaller breathes out, his chest already heaving but then he hears his belt buckle being opened and his mind is left blank.  
  


It’s not like he cares.  
It’s not like he has any romantic feelings for the boy on top of him because he doesn’t. They are both looking for something else, both looking for some relief with no strings attached.  
His tight skinny jeans get tugged at and he holds up his bum for a moment so Sehun can pull them off.  
He plants his body back into the mattress, lets out a stuttered breath of relief when he knows that his backside is fully covered.  
That the stamen above him can’t see him. Can’t see his pale and undecorated skin.

“Are you okay?”, Sehun asks him, genuine concern written over his features but Baekhyun only pulls him down into an open-mouthed kiss, shutting him up successfully  
“I’m fine”, he rasps out after the taller releases his bottom lip from his sharp teeth  
“Get on with it”  
Baekhyun just wants these lips to kiss him and those hands to touch him.  
He wants that Sehun takes his mind off all the things that keep on swirling inside his brain, the perpetual fear of ‘what if’ deeply rooted inside of him.  
What if it doesn’t work again?  
What if he will never bloom?

“Fuck”, escapes his mouth as Sehun mouths along his hardened erection and he inhales sharply when nimble fingers finally take off his boxers.  
His thighs tremble with arousal, his cherry-tree branch prickles at the prospect of bliss that is coming his way in the form of a sly and hot mouth.  
Baekhyun immediately grabs a hand-full of blonde hair as the Hibiscus stamen drags his tongue up his shaft, as he engulfs the head in his warm cavern to make the raven haired see stars

“Oh fuck yes”  
The smaller had had his fair share of sex in his life, but he can tell that Sehun wasn’t far behind concerning experience.  
The blonde takes him deeper, squeezes his thighs as if he knows they are Baekhyun’s weak spot and he has the cherry stamen gasping for air in no time.  
Sehun moans around his hot flesh, seemingly loving the way that the smaller pulls on his soft tufts and kisses the tip of his dick almost affectionately.

Baekhyun looks up, lifts his torso a little of the bed, always keeping in mind to not show off his back and locks eyes with the other stamen.  
His brown orbs travel lower, close in delight every time that Sehun pumps his cock lazily with his one hand, and finally settle on the blonde’s pale orange buds.  
He can’t even remember when the other had gotten out of his shirt, but again, it’s not like he cares.  
The light haired stamen has enough alcohol in his system to take things as they come.  
And right now, he’d really really like to take Sehun’s dick.

“I’ve got lube in the drawer”, the blonde mumbles and flicks his wrist just to get some reaction from his counterpart. Baekhyun hums and whines at the same time.  
“Can lube actually expire?”, the taller scrunches up his eyebrows as he retrieves an un-used bottle of clear liquid  
“No idea.”  
And honestly, this isn’t really the conversation he wants to have right now  
“First time with another stamen?”, Baekhyun asks nonetheless, curiosity getting the better of him  
“Pretty much”, the blonde shrugs and uncaps the bottle now, slicking up two of his fingers  
“I’m better than any pistil anyway”, the pink haired teases and that makes Sehun grin at him, his orange florets trembling slightly as they urge the taller on

The stamen nudges Baekhyun’s thighs apart, settles between them and teases his entrance with the two lubed up digits.  
Sehun’s breath tickles his ear and the latter bites down, nibbling on the flesh before releasing it  
“You’re definitely prettier than most”  
Baekhyun’s breath hitches and then he’s being spread open, his mouth going lax as he pants for air  
“Angh”, he rolls his eyes back, squeezes them shut as the familiar pain shoots through him, but he welcomes it gladly.

Prettier than most.  
He had heard something along those lines before. Someone had called him pretty before.

“More”, he doesn’t have the time to wreck his brain for long lost memories now. He wants to concentrate on those two long fingers that are working inside of him, and which are not enough.  
“I’m not a fragile, wet pistil”, he hisses, his teeth grit together and then finally he feels another digit being pushed inside of him and he moans out in apprehension of the stinging pain.  
Sehun looks at him with an expression of something he cannot assess, but he guesses that the other stamen was carrying his own baggage.  
He is not the person to pry.  
Not his business.

When he feels drool running down his chin, dark spots clouding his vision, he knows they need to step up their game if they both want to reach their designated destination.  
He growls in the back of his throat and that makes Sehun stop with his ministrations, pulling out his fingers and leaving a lingering kiss on his hip bone  
  
“What’s wrong?”, he asks yet again and Baekhyun considers for a moment to just flip the other over and screw his worried ass.  
He doesn’t however, just swallows and takes in a deep breath.  
Sehun’s scent was faint.  
Hibiscus’ didn’t have a strong smell, but they were far more beautiful than most flowers out there.

“You’re close to bursting”, Baekhyun teases the male above him and he watches as the other smirks  
“Maybe”, he breathes and opens the bottle again, squeezing out a generous amount of lube before he slicks himself up, hand quivering slightly as he gives himself pleasure  
“Then hurry up and burst _inside_ me”  
The stamen knows he has hit a nerve when Sehun narrows his eyes.  
“Come on”, he licks his lips and spreads his legs just a little wider, not feeling the lightest bit ashamed of his action  
“I want you to ride me”, Sehun whispers but Baekhyun immediate shakes his head.  
“No”  
Never.  
His eyes are slightly wider, his leaves trembling in fear of being too exposed

“I don’t do that”, he mutters, confidence lost  
“Take it or leave it”  
Sehun looks taken aback for a moment, but then he shrugs his shoulders and utters a curt ‘okay’, before he inches closer to the other stamen’s body and pushes in.

It leaves Baekhyun breathless for a split second, the feeling of being stretched so unbelievable wide has his body revolting for a moment before he finally catches himself and breathes again.  
Sehun’s voice bounces off the walls and the fragrance of the taller stamen intensifies, wraps him in a blanket of soft aromas that he has never smelled before and fills him with the hope of ‘ _maybe today_ ’.  
The blonde doesn’t waste too much time, sets a pace akin to his liking, his buds slowly opening with the growing pleasure that surges through both their veins.

The smaller feels warm hands pressing into his skin, feels the other holding his legs apart and leaving bruises there, but he doesn’t care.  
His mouth is hanging open, his vocal cords producing snippets of ‘ _fuck yes_ ’ and ‘ _harder Sehun harder_ ’ while the other drives himself into the pink haired stamen.  
The other remembers to pump him, even though the rhythm is off, but how can Baekhyun complain when he feels so bloody good, his skin burning as if he was on fire.  
He feels it throughout his whole body, feels his leaves shuddering and tingle as he gets closer and closer, so damn close that he is already missing Sehun’s florets blasting open on his abdomen.

The other’s dick is driving him insane, his body arching off the mattress with every thrust that is aimed right, that tickles his sweet spot and he knows he won’t take long anymore.

“Fuck, you’re so hot”, the blonde moans into his ear after Baekhyun pulled him down for a kiss to muffle his absurdly loud moans.  
Sehun is so damn good at this, renders him into a complete mess of sweat and spit and –

He cums with a loud groan, the taller’s hand stroking him in erratic pumps as his hot seed squirts out in white ribbons of thick semen.  
Sehun keeps on slamming his hips, keeps on burying his hard cock in him, bringing him through his orgasm and nearing his own white heaven.  
“I’m gonna… angh fuck, fuck I’m gonna b-bloom so hard-“  
Usually Baekhyun isn’t the one for dirty talking, but his mind is too far gone at the moment.  
His body is trembling with bliss, adrenalin causing his heart to pump faster than ever as every flower on Sehun’s body bursts open, as the other cums deep inside of him.

There is something fresh in the air, Baekhyun notes, but he can’t put a finger on it.  
His head is still swimming as the taller drops on top of him and pulls him close for what seems to be an after-gardening cuddle and really, the smaller is too exhausted to complain and stop him.  
The silence of the room is only interrupted by their heaving breathing, neither of them speaking for a while until they have both calmed down.  
The pastel orange flowers on Sehun’s skin stand in full bloom, mocking Baekhyun with their beauty.

He feels good, he feels damn good but he knows… he feels…  
That it hadn’t been enough.  
There had been no ‘ _boom_ ’ as Chanyeol had once described it.  
He moves out of the other’s embrace now, gets back into his pants and hurries to get his shirt over his head, hiding his cherry-tree branch from curious eyes

“I can see I wasn’t a good rebound-fuck, eh?”  
Baekhyun turns around sharply, eyes wide with embarrassment as the blonde obviously points out his lack of blossoms.  
“What are you talking about? You’re not a rebound-fuck. You’re a random fuck”  
Sehun only raises his eyebrows at this and the other stamen gets irritated, feels his tattoo itch in discomfort.

“Fine. You were a good rebound-fuck to _me_ , at least”  
“Glad to be of help?”, Baekhyun gets into his leather jacket and opens the door before turning around to wave goodbye  
“Thanks”  
Thanks for the fuck.

But the pleasure that he had received leaves him empty now. His stomach churns, and he finds himself out in the streets in the middle of the night.  
The stamen pulls out his phone, presses the speed-dial button and is immediately connected to Jongdae’s number

_Please pick up_ , Baekhyun whines, the cold air of the crisp autumn night already freezing him down to his bones.  
“Baek?”  
_Yes_ , he inwardly yells in joy. He knows that he can count on his best friend even if the other must have been quite busy himself.  
“Dae, listen its freaking cold and I’m in…”, he stops mid-sentence and looks for the sign that spells out the street name  
“Gonghangdaero”, he reads out and takes a look around  
“There’s a seven-eleven and a pharmacy here. Can you come get me?”  
The other owns an old excuse of a car, but it’s driving and that is what counts.  
He already grins into the speaker because, well, this is Jongdae he was talking to, his best friend, and the other would always come to save him.

“No”  
Baekhyun furrows his brows.  
“Wh-what?”  
“I said no. I’m not coming”, Jongdae’s usually chipper voice doesn’t hold a fragment of amusement  
“Dae. Stop joking, I’m in the middle of nowhere”, he takes another look around, but can’t spot any bus sign or a subway station.  
Not like they would still be running this late.

So Jongdae is his last hope. He can’t say no! Even if that pistil is still curled up in his arms or something. Baekhyun is his best friend and it’s bros before hoes.

Unless… they had gotten to the pistils place without Jongdae’s car?  
That would explain some things, but definitely not the coldness of the younger’s voice.  
Maybe he is pissed because Baekhyun assumed he is sober enough to drive?

There are too many questions in his head and he knows he won’t find an answer to them now, but he needs his best friend, needs Jongdae to come pick him up.

“Jongdae please I’m really not joking or are you-“

“I’m being serious. I’m not coming”  
“Dae-“  
“Shut up. You wanted to get fucked, you left. Your problem. Bye”  
The phone call ends and reality settles in.

Jongdae, his best friend, had ditched him. For a carnation pistil he had just met.  
  
Leaving him in the middle of the night somewhere in Seoul, his battery down to 15 percent.  
“You’ve got to be kidding me!”, he screams out, frustrated beyond belief but when he re-dials Jongdae’s number he is met with a generated voice that tells him that the person he’s calling is not available.

 

The cab he rides home costs him more than a week worth or partying and booze.  
Baekhyun grits his teeth as he arrives in his small apartment, mind set on letting Kim Jongdae pay him back for this.

 

_**A/N: Thank you for reading this!  
Special thanks to L because she made this possible.** _

_**XOXO Voltage** _


	3. Magnolia

 

The next morning comes with birds chirping and the sun blinding him through the window, not exactly tickling the stamen awake. Instead, it felt like he had been punched in the face, rolled up like a futon and dumped eventually on the hard ground.

“Fuck”, Baekhyun breathes, his hand coming up to rub his temples.  
This was by far the worst morning he had ever experienced

He can’t even remember the ride home after Jongdae hadn’t answered his second call.  
What he remembers though, is the smug smirk of the cab driver that he had been faced with as he told the man his address.  
He also recalls the gaping hole in his wallet.  
“Bloody hell”  
There was a nightmare of a headache pounding in his skull and he wishes he had remembered to drink water before going to sleep.  
Maybe it would be a tad bit better then at least.  
But no, he had forgotten and now he had to deal with it.

He shifted slowly, trying to raise his body from his mattress when he flinches and drops back down.  
Right.  
“Bastard”, the raven haired curses as he feels his back in flames. Baekhyun had this problem where he forgets that thorough preparation is the key to a painless morning after when he drinks more than he should.  
Perhaps he shouldn’t have downed those two or three extra tequilas after watching Jongdae getting along with that petite pistil.  
A groan leaves his throat and his hand wanders from his forehead into his light locks. He ruffles them for a moment before he grips them tightly, any pain better than that stupid headache.  
Where’s Jongdae with some Aspirin when he needed him?

Jongdae…  
Baekhyun hadn’t even known that his best friend liked petite and fragile pistils like the guy he had talked to yesterday. He had had orange hair, plump lips and a skinny form.  
Is that really what his best friend was into? He seemed like the clingy type…  
Jongdae could do so much better!

“Just fuck this”, he groaned out and wanted to hide in his bed forever.  
If his mother would ever hear him talk like that, all curses and profanities, she would use a large amount of curd soap to wash his mouth clean.  
The pink haired stamen scrunches up his nose and finally manages to throw the duvet of his body.  
“Aspirin…”  
Where does Jongdae usually hide that… Somewhere in the bathroom…  
“Shouldn’t I know, it’s my apartment”, Baekhyun scolds himself and makes his way into the small windowless room where he opens any drawer available until he finds the package with the pills inside.  
“Finally”, he chugs two of them down, doesn’t even need water, and hums afterwards.  
Now he just needs to wait a little, till the effects would kick in.  
Maybe he would remember then why he had slept with his phone clutched in his hands.

\--

He does remember in the end.  
When the pounding of the headache had subsided, his back slowly feeling better and his ability to sit without fidgeting back to normal, it comes to him. The memories of the previous night.  
Jongdae had left with the pistil boy.  
They had been flirting openly, not that he had heard any words but their broad smiles and the pistil’s burning gaze had been enough for him to know.  
  
Baekhyun is still worried.  
He had immediately checked his phone, but there had been no message from his best friend.  
Nothing indicating his well-being or that he needs help, that the night had been fantastic or downright horrible.  
Nothing.

His brown eyes focus on his message box that indicates zero new messages. He had even checked all of his four social network accounts he uses, as well as any messenger he had ever downloaded in case there is something, anything.  
He is a fully grown man, he reasons with himself.  
Jongdae is doing just fine. Just because he doesn’t call or text him does it not automatically mean that he is being eaten by a Russian grizzly bear.  
Baekhyun growls at himself and at the direction his thoughts are taking.  
Are there even grizzly bears in Russia?

The stamen contemplates for a moment to use his phone to _naver_ that, but he decides against it. He is getting paranoid and reading about big, scary animals with huge fangs definitely wouldn’t make it better.  
Perhaps, that boy was such a good flowerbed that Jongdae just hadn’t parted from him yet. Baekhyun grips his teacup tighter and feels his leaves shake in distaste.  
If his best friend really is after such a fragile, but ridiculously _tall_ thing, the elder would make sure to arrange an intervention.

\--

It’s been another day and he hasn’t heard anything from his best friend. The worry starts to eat him alive so Baekhyun has to come up with a plan. And said scheme includes Jongdae’s friends, Kyungsoo and Chanyeol who also were his acquaintances.  
The three of them often spend their breaks together, his best friend apparently not minding third-wheeling the couple.  
But really, it’s not his business.  
  
The only thing he should concentrate on is finding a way to meet and talk to Jongdae.  
He needs to mend things between them and that is by far more important than pondering their free time activities.  
So, he needs to gather information and he just knows the right guy for that.  
You see, Baekhyun knows who the weakest link in their chain of friends is and how to get what he wants.  
  
He licks his lips as he texts up Chanyeol, asking him how his day had been so far, how he and Kyungsoo are doing.  
The stamen is honestly happy for the couple as the tallest answers that they are going strong, but there is something that Baekhyun wants to know, needs to know and there is no way in hell he would lose his focus.  
>What are you doing after class?<  
The question was legit, wouldn’t raise suspicion because Baekhyun’s language faculty is right on the other side of their campus. Jongdae and the others are located in the arts department and it just so happens that they were separated by the labs of the aspiring physicians and chemists, which leaves the eldest with no other possibility but to frequently text his best friend and his group about their plans.

>Usual Café, Soo and Dae have already ordered<

Jackpot. Baekhyun’s face lights up when he reads the response of the rose stamen.  So Jongdae is indeed with the others.  
Sorry Chanyeol, the pink haired hums. He feels a little bad for using him, but it was for a greater good. If his assumptions are right and his best friend is avoiding him for his sake, then he needed to talk to the other.  
Because it was just stupid. They were best friends, Jongdae shouldn’t feel bad about it just because… Baekhyun feels his tattoo prickle in a touch of shame.  
Because he just… isn’t like the others. It is not Jongdae’s fault and he should definitely not suffer from it.  
It was Baekhyun’s problem.

The stamen pockets his phone and makes his way to the Starbucks Coffee they frequent together.  
It takes him roughly ten minutes, the red light keeping him up most of the time.  
Some of the students apparently don’t value their life enough as they made their way over the street when cars rushed by left and right. But Baekhyun isn’t like that thank you very much.  
He could be a shining example for good behaviour if he had to.

The bells jingle above him and it doesn’t even take him a second to spot the tuft of brown hair. Baekhyun feels his body flush with relief as he sees Jongdae sitting there, a hot chocolate in front of him and his soft laughter carried through the air.  
He hadn’t even realised how damn nervous and concerned he had been.  
But now that his own eyes take the other in, he feels better. Much better.  
And he would make the other regret that jerk move of his.

Kyungsoo and Chanyeol are facing his way, but luckily they don’t acknowledge his presence just yet.  
Good for him, he grins brightly and wraps his arms around his best friend’s neck.

“Kim Jongdae!”, he yells into the other’s ear  
“What do you think you are doing, ignoring me like that! I was worried sick!”  
He had been.  
Still is.  
Before he hadn’t heard the whole story about the fateful night the small voice that keeps on telling him that something went horribly wrong will not fade. He is worried, the memories of his own first time haunting him.  
He knows how it is, understands that it is hard to open up to another person and let them see everything of you.  
To a stranger at that.  
It takes a lot of self-confidence to get out of your clothes and to let out noises of pleasure. He had been more than embarrassed, his voice hitching and his moans dripping from his lips without fail.  
He had needed Jongdae close to finally calm down and digest everything. But then again… he had been a sixteen year old seedling.   
  
He had been young yes, but your first time would always be the first time, no matter what age.  
It’s not like you grow more confident or experienced by years.

He takes the seat next to his best friend, waves a quick hello to Kyungsoo and Chanyeol before his eyes are back on Jongdae.  
Honestly, he is just glad that the younger hadn’t been eaten by a wild grizzly. He grins back at his friend, honestly relieved at the other’s well-being, but the way the younger’s body tenses up stays unnoticed by him.

“I’m fine. You don’t need to worry about me”, the brunet speaks up finally and Baekhyun nudges him in response  
“Of course I was worried! You left to garden with that petite sprout! How could I not worry, Dae, I’m your best friend”, he reasons and watches as Jongdae’s eyes flash with guilt.  
That hadn’t been what he wanted.  
Not at all.  
He is here to make the other feel better and to encourage him to talk to the elder about everything and not make him feel even worse.  
“I’m sorry”, the younger breathes and it is exactly what Baekhyun had feared.  
“Don’t be silly”, he grins and tries to make the other smile  
“Let me guess, he was that good that you two didn’t leave the bed, huh? That’s okay!”, he really wants the other to feel better. To smile and maybe joke about it with him. Like they always do.  
  
Had Jongdae bloomed with the pistil boy underneath him? Baekhyun refrains from biting his bottom lip as his thoughts continue to wander.

Had the pink carnation boy brought him to completion?  
A shiver runs down his back and he tightens his hold on the table in front of him.  
Don’t think of it, he scolds himself. Don’t get jealous over it.  
“Was flowering so good that you forgot your best friend over it?”  
Fuck.  
He wants to slap himself as these words leave his mouth.  
That had sounded more than just accusing.  
Baekhyun wishes he can take the words and stuff them back into his non-filtered mouth, but it’s futile and so he tries to laugh it off.  
“Sorry, you know I don’t mean it like that”, he keeps his eyes on Jongdae, waits till these pink lips pull into a smile, but his best friend doesn’t give him an answer, doesn’t grin back at him.  
Just stares at him with a mixture of hurt and confusion.

“How was it? Good? Come on I don’t want the details, but give me something I can work with?”  
Why isn’t the other answering? And why can’t he drop a topic when his best friend is seemingly uncomfortable with it?  
Is it embarrassing for him to talk about it? But then again, Jongdae isn’t blushing, isn’t hiding his face in his hands or clinging to him because it had been horrible.  
His best friend just sits there, hot chocolate forgotten on the table.

“Are you playing dense, Baekhyun? Jongdae clearly doesn’t want to talk to you. But apparently you’re too full of yourself to see that, and instead, you keep on asking ridiculous questions.”, the pistil of their group rolls his eyes, venom clear in his voice.  
“What are you even talking about?”, Baekhyun hisses as Kyungsoo glares at him  
“I’m not dense and definitely not full of myself! I care, that’s why I keep asking. Jongdae hasn’t talked to me about it at all”, he side-eyes his best friend  
“And I’m worried, okay? I’m sure you two have been worried as well”, he grumbles. But apparently it had only been him that Jongdae had been ignoring. So what is the other getting at? To the stamen it doesn’t make any sense. But then again when did Do Kyungsoo ever make sense! Never to Byun Baekhyun.  
  
“I can’t believe that you really have to ask”, the pistil mutters and the pink haired is about to lose his cool and demand the other to drop it or elaborate what his shenanigan is all about, but Jongdae beats him to it  
“Drop it, Kyungsoo”, the brunet says and gets up, bringing a few bills onto the table  
“It doesn’t matter anyway”, he hears his best friend say before the younger moves to leave the establishment  
“Hey Dae, wait!”, he wants to go after his best friend, but the other had already left through the door, the bells jingling again.  
Baekhyun drops back into his seat and exhales loudly  
“Seriously what’s up with him”  
He hears some rustling and when he looks up he takes in the sight of Chanyeol holding down his lover by his quaking shoulders.  
“I can’t… Byun Baekhyun, don’t play dumb now”  
“I’m not playing anything, I’m just worried about him! I have no idea what’s wrong with him!”  
He had been avoiding him ever since that day in the club.  
Had he done something wrong?  
He had stuck to his promise, he had been there for Jongdae till the younger had found someone!  
“Ever since he went with that pistil boy, he’s been ignoring me!”, he grumbles  
“Wait…”  
Could it be… no.  
“Is it because of the kiss? Is he awkward around me because I kissed him? I told him it was a bro-job, he shouldn’t be dwelling on this!”  
It had been just a trick to get away from his very persistent and very annoying ex-kinda-girlfriend. Not that they had been a couple for long. Maybe a month?  
Before Baekhyun realised that this would never work out. She was jealous of anyone who looked his way and she downright hated Jongdae.  
And well, in retrospect, that had been the final reason he had broken up with her. Jongdae is his other half. If you don’t like him you can hit the road. Without Baekhyun.

He notices two pairs of eyes on him and crosses his arms in defence.  
“What? I told him it was nothing, if he is upset about me kissing him then… shit, I should have apologised better.”  
“You did what?”, Kyungsoo glared at him  
“It wasn’t what you are thinking! My ex-girlfriend came along and I threw myself at Jongdae and kissed him so she wouldn’t see my face, or if she did that she thinks I’m taken. I really don’t want to associate with her ever again!”, not even in his nightmares he wants to add, but decides against it.  
“I told Jongdae, he said it’s okay. I thought we were cool. It was a true and one-time only bro-job”  
He hears the pistil opposite to him exhale, yet Baekhyun isn’t bothered by that.  
It’s not like it had been the other’s first kiss or something. He knows that it hadn’t been, so they can’t judge him.  
Jongdae had been okay with it! He said so himself.

“I can’t believe it”  
“Soo…”, Chanyeol’s voice is soothing and the eldest stamen gets more and more confused. Is he missing something?  
Anyway.  
Now that he had re-established that it can’t be the kiss…

“It has to be the carnation pistil”, he shrugs  
“He left with him for a full-night adventure in foreign flowerbeds”, the pink haired sighs. Why can’t he get that mental image out of his mind?  
The fragrance of the pink carnation, the small smile the boy had sent Jongdae? Everything is still clear and vibrant in his memories.  
He had been pretty yes, had apparently known the right words…  
Still, he had never guessed that Jongdae’s type would be the ‘cute and _taller_ pistil’ one. The stamen doesn’t even realise he had crossed his arms and scowled aloud.

“Baekhyun”, Chanyeol speaks up and the eldest shifted his attention to the taller  
“I think there is a misunderstanding”, he scrunches up his nose  
“Jongdae never left with anyone. I got him from the club, he never slept with that pistil you keep on mentioning either. I picked him up, I drove him home. Alone.”  
And Baekhyun is left dumbfounded.  
He _what_?  
His brain doesn’t want to process what he had just heard.  
Jongdae hadn’t left with him? With that too _tall_ , too skinny, and too smiley Carnation?  
Meaning… his buds haven’t been popped?

“What…”, he is gaping like a fish in a pond  
“But why? I thought he liked him… they got along well! Why wouldn’t Jongdae take that chance?”, it doesn’t make sense to him. His leaves tingle in silent glee at the news, that his best friend is still untouched, his magnolias still the small white buds Baekhyun enjoys counting, but the small ripple of relief that floods him tells him more than he wants to know, more than he wants to acknowledge.

“Are you really telling me that you are too blind to see that Jongdae’s been fancying you since he was what? Sixteen?”

And just like that Baekhyun’s world comes crashing down.

He feels shell-shocked and frozen to the core, Kyungsoo’s words repeating themselves over and over again in his mind.  
But no matter how often they got reversed, they don’t make sense to the elder.  
Jongdae…fancies him?  
That was ridiculous.  
They were best friends after all, nothing more, nothing less.

He feels a strange jolt down his spine that numbs the feeling in his tattoo for a moment, before he feels it burn his skin, hot and irritant.  
“What… are you talking about? Don’t be ridiculous, Kyungsoo”  
“He is serious”, the black haired pistil grunts and looks at his lover  
“Yeol, he is serious. He didn’t know.”, there was plain disbelief written over both their faces as they turn back to the pink haired stamen in front of them  
“I didn’t know  because there is nothing to know!”

The heat spreads and he feels it creep to his cheeks, colouring them a bright red.  
“I have no idea what you are talking about! Of course Jongdae does not _fancy_ me!”   
Simply stupid.

Baekhyun hadn’t even realised that he had gotten up from the chair he had occupied.  
“I’ll prove it!”  
And with that he leaves the café just as his best friend had, bells chiming above him before he hurries down the street which Jongdae had probably taken.  
No.

It just can’t be true.  
They are best friends! The other would have mentioned it! Since they had been sixteen? Even more unbelievable.  
The stamen sprints down the sidewalk, spots a familiar tuft of brown hair and picks up the pace.  
He needs to talk to the other.  
Baekhyun needs this off his chest, because it just can’t be true and Kyungsoo was a liar, and nothing made sense anymore.  
It was like a nightmare, his heart pounding so damn fast in his ribcage at the prospect of what the pistil’s words had implied.  
His cherry tree was trembling in a form of fear he had never experienced before and he has no idea what it means either.  
The only thing he _does_ know is that he has to talk to his best friend.  
Now.

He finally gets a hold of him at the next corner and sharply pulls on the other’s arm to make him stop.  
“Jongdae!”  
Baekhyun has his mind set.  
He needs to talk this out with the brunet, Kyungsoo just can’t be right.  
The stamen is convinced that it had been a joke and that Jongdae and him will laugh it off in no time.  
That is what he expects, and when his best friend doesn’t meet his eyes, he immediately knows that nothing like this is going to happen. No laughter comes.  
There is something hanging in the air between them and it’s only when he sees Jongdae’s shoulders quake that he can move and speak again.  
“Dae?”  
What he does not expect, is for his best friend to look up with big tears in his eyelashes.  
Baekhyun had seen the other cry countless of times, but it always makes his chest constrict, always chokes up his lungs and always leaves him hurting.  
Jongdae’s face is not meant for tears.  
Not when he looks simply gorgeous with those lips curled upward in a broad smile.

“Tell me it’s not true”, he rambles out, totally ignoring the fact that Jongdae can’t possibly know what he is talking about.  
“Tell me it’s not true, Dae, damn it!”, he grips the other’s shoulders, wants to shake him, wants the answer to tumble out of his best friend’s mouth.  
“Kyungsoo is just pulling my leg right? You’re not in love with me!”

Jongdae goes numb in his grip.  
Baekhyun freezes at the same moment, a shiver running down his spine as he feels a pang in his heart.  
But he simply doesn’t want to believe it.  
No matter how real it might just be.  
“You’re not right? We… are best friends. Why should you be in love with me?”  
Baekhyun is far from being a perfect catch, at least in his own eyes.  
He is loud, definitely noisy, he can never shut up even if he has lost the argument long ago. Moreover, he pretends to be a smart mouth and nags a lot.  
The stamen likes to drink, likes to flirt. He is not the boyfriend you’d like to have.  
Hell, Baekhyun wouldn’t date himself either.

But Jongdae’s lips pull into a small and sweet smile, yet the chuckle he lets out is bitter.  
“Right? I keep asking me the same thing”  
Baekhyun’s heart pounds in his ears.  
It’s louder than ever and it pumps the feeling of anxiety down his veins.  
“No… Dae… you…”

“You can laugh at me if you want”, the comment sounds like it had been supposed to be trenchant, but it comes as a whisper from the brunet’s lips  
“I was waiting for this to happen anyway”  
The elder had let go from the other’s shoulders, Baekhyun’s arms now lax against his sides. His brain isn’t catching up, and the weight of the words hadn’t settled in yet.  
Jongdae looks small right now, like he is trying to hide away from the elder’s eyes  
“No Dae… come on don’t-“

“Just leave it”, the brunet takes a step back, doesn’t meet his friend’s eyes and honestly Baekhyun is glad for that because he knows he can’t handle a broken Jongdae.  
“Dae-“  
“Leave it. If you have the decency to not laugh at me, I’m grateful already. But just… leave me alone, Baek”  
There is a terrible sign of rejection in the other’s eyes, in those brown orbs that now lock with his and Baekhyun had never seen his best friend look so dejected.  
They are usually a warm chocolate brown, glowing with kindness and friendliness. Now they just look dull.  
“You… are serious? You are… in love with me?”  
The elder still hasn’t wrapped his head around it.  
Jongdae says nothing but Baekhyun sees that the other is trembling. He wants to reach out and embrace his best friend, tell him it’ll be okay, tell him-  
“You think I’m joking?”, the brunet looks away again and huffs  
“What did I expect…”, he hears his best friend mutter something, but he can’t quite catch it, he is too preoccupied with all the thoughts in his brain and the fact that his best friend since forever just confessed his feelings to him.  
“Dae, we can-“  
“No. Leave it. It’s not like… I ever expected you to like me back. You never looked at me like you looked at all those others. I get it. I’m your best friend. Just… leave it. I’ll get over it”

“Dae,-“, he tries again, but this time the younger is faster, turns on his heels and runs away from him.  
Baekhyun is left like that, watching his best friend, the one who had always been there for him who accompanied him through thick and thin, run away from him.

His leaves tingle and he swears he feels them rustling on his back. He wants to run after the other, but at the same time he understands that Jongdae probably doesn’t want to see him right now.  
But that’s okay.  
They are best friends and they had managed to stick together until now. Jongdae will come around. And then they would talk about it, and they will be glued at the hip again.

Jongdae has always been there.  
Baekhyun would apologise for his rude behaviour and everything will fall into place again. Jongdae’s hand will be back around his waist to hold him, his smile will be back to make him feel better and his voice will be there to soothe him.  
He knows he should have handled this better, should have been more empathetic, more gentle.  
But he promises to make up for it as soon as the other will allow him to apologise.

Jongdae isn’t one to hold grudges. Especially not with Baekhyun.  
Or so he thinks. 

 

**A/N:**  thank you for the kudos and/or commenting!! I really appreciate it! I hope more people will write this AU ;)

XOXO Voltage


	4. Cherry

 

Only that Jongdae seems to be avoiding him now.  
Baekhyun’s dark circles become more prominent each day, and the message he is typing right now is not the first in that week, that day, that hour, that minute.

_> Dae, please answer me<_

Baekhyun’s fingers glide over the screen effortlessly, typing the same words.

_> Hey … I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. Please text me back?<_

He doesn’t even count the times he’d tried calling the other male anymore. The stamen had given up around number 21.  
The days he spent being miserable about his best friend had blurred together by now anyway. If it wouldn’t be for his classes, he wouldn’t even know what day it is today.  
But due to certain circumstances, Jongdae always reminds him of his classes.  
Reminding does sound a little too nice. Usually he gets scolded.  
‘Baek, have you finished your essay for your ‘Print-on demand Poetry’ class? You know it’s due on Monday. Which is today’  
So yeah, Baekhyun actually knows that he should be sitting in said class.

Instead, he is still lying on his bed in his messy apartment.  
His far too quiet apartment. He can’t even remember the last time it had been this… quiet.  
No loud swearing, no sounds of something toppling of, no laughter… no Jongdae.

When had been the last time he felt so lonely?

Had he ever been really lonely in the past? Because as far as he can remember _someone_ had always been there; right next to him.  
“Jongdae…”, he breathes out the name of his best friend as if that alone could mend the cracks between them.  
He buries his head in a fluffy pillow, breathes out heavily and ignores the way his emitted breath full of carbon dioxide hits him right back in the face.  
His mind is too busy repeating why a douche like him shouldn’t be allowed to breathe in the first place.

>Kyungsoo, I can’t reach Jongdae… Can you tell him I’m sorry and that he should please text me back? Thank you<  
He can’t remember ever texting Kyungsoo like this before. Especially not with correct grammar and such a polite wording.

>I can’t remember that I ever agreed on being your homing pigeon, Byun. Sort it out on your own<  
Well, he had kind of expected an answer like this.  
But still, he had had some hope left.

>Chanyeol, can you tell Jongdae I’m sorry and that he should please text me back?<  
It’s not like he doesn’t have another ace up his sleeve.  
However, Baekhyun has to realise that he wasn’t the only one with a plan B in this  
>I’m sorry man, I’m not allowed to talk to you or I’m banned from Eden for a month. Good luck<

“Urgh, Do Kyungsoo!”, the stamen screams and he can practically see the pistil boy’s smirk. That Chanyeol wasn’t referring to one of their usual clubs named Eden was pretty obvious.  
The taller stamen was whipped and wouldn’t even think of gardening outside his own territory.

Baekhyun made a face.  
He had tried to sort it out on his own. Had apologised over and over again, but he had never received a single sign of acknowledgement. It was like he doesn’t even exist to the other anymore. The stamen had tried everything, had even messaged him a casual ‘I’m thinking of dying my hair back to black, what do you think?’ because he thought that at least that would get him an answer.  
A one word answer would have been sufficient.  
Pink is Jongdae’s favourite colour after all, and the younger stamen had threatened him every time he had suggested dying it any other colour.

Baekhyun had died his hair black the next day just to spite his best friend.  
But not even the selca with his new raven locks had gotten him any response.  
He was at a loss. And now he couldn’t even use Chanyeol or Kyungsoo anymore.

_> You’re a cruel man, Do Kyungsoo. Threatening your boyfriend like that<_  
Baekhyun grins to himself a little, feeling his chest actually fill with something that isn’t regret.  
  


But the smile falls again the second he reads over the other’s answer  
_> Says the one who breaks hearts as if they are worth nothing<_

The black haired male inhales sharply, feels his stomach knot in the worst ways as he drinks in the words. They are accusing, and they hit home with their sharpened blade.  
Yet, Baekhyun wants to deny.  
Because what the other is saying is not true. He has never treated Jongdae as if he is worth nothing. His best friend is… important to him. He is special to him in every way, the only one who could actually keep up with his silly mind and his sassy mouth.

And _besides_.  
How should he have known?  
It’s not like Jongdae had ever said anything about it. How was he supposed to find out? Smell it? Look into his best friend’s eyes and immediately understand that ‘ _fuck, bro you’re in love with me right? For so many years already!_ ’  
Sure.  
“It’s unfair”, he whispers out in his silent bedroom  
“You’re unfair Jongdae…”, as if the other would actually answer him  
“You’re making me the bad guy… you never said anything…” , he sighs loudly and grabs his hair firmly, trying to pull on it till it hurts too much so he let go.

“You’re being unfair…”  
He looks at his phone again, lets his eyes wander over the endless texts he had typed out. None of them had gotten an answer  
>You’re being unfair Dae. If you ignore me, how the hell should I apologise?!<  
He feels how the heat rises in his stomach, he knows he is getting unreasonable angry over this, but before he can stop himself he had already pressed send.  
He stares at his words for some seconds before he quickly types

>I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get mad. I miss you<

Nothing.  
The messaging thread stays one-sided.

Baekhyun releases a shaky breath.  
His tattoo is prickling in a very unpleasant way, ever since Jongdae had turned his back on him that day.  
It is like a perpetual itch and no matter what the stamen tries, it’s not going away.  
It’s sadness, he concludes.  
The feelings in his chest and what causes him to feel this miserable.  
Sadness and loneliness.

His leaves tingle every time he switches on his phone’s screen, every time his eyes catch sight of curly lips that stare back at him.  
Baekhyun feels like he can’t breathe, the longer he looks at Jongdae’s and his picture, the longer he takes in those deep eyes.  
When his lungs ache with the need for oxygen, he knows that he really should breathe, but he doesn’t until he had finally swiped over his lock screen.  
The air burns as it travels down his pipe, but he feels a little better now.  
Not like his leaves are about to fall off from the lack of sustenance.

“Why did you never say anything?”, and why is he talking out loud? Jongdae isn’t here. He won’t give him an answer, but that doesn’t stop the stamen from doing it  
“Damn I’m your best friend… we could have talked about it!”, he hits the wall with his fist and tries not to whine as the pain shot through him.  
Why is he such an idiot?

He switches his phone back on and is faced with the same gentle smile and the same warm eyes. Only that they don’t give him an answer.

“Fuck this!”, he flings the device onto the mattress and watches it bounce for a moment before he brings his hands up to rub his face, to hold his eyes closed.  
Baekhyun doesn’t know what to do.

Jongdae is the smart one between them.

Eventually, he gets the phone back into his hands, closes his eyes until he has swiped away the damn selca and opens his picture folder.  
The stamen tries to deny the way his stomach churned when he flicked through the endless pictures of his best friend and himself and finally finds a picture of a baby giraffe.  
He sets it as his new lock screen and chuckles at the memory of the photo he had chosen.

Baekhyun remembers that it had been one of the first texts he had ever received from the tall stamen called Park Chanyeol and it had been accompanied with the message ‘ _sorry wrong chat window!_ ’ and the elder couldn’t help but answer ‘ _I see Park, so this is the kind of pictures you send your boyfriend?_ ’ to that.  
What he also remembers is the death glare he had received from Do Kyungsoo the next time he had met the couple.

Now these memories make him laugh. Back then, he had been simply terrified of an early death.

\--

After also missing his Tuesday classes, which consist of wonderful hours listening to his slightly psychotic professor for the ‘ _Women who kill_ ’ class, followed up by ‘ _the sensational 18 th century_’, which he actually enjoyed, he decides that he had had enough of lamenting.

Baekhyun knows that he cannot go on like this. He can’t keep on missing his classes in favour of staying in bed all day.  
The stamen actually cares for his grades, thank you very much, and if Jongdae doesn’t want to cooperate for the time being, so be it.  
He has his ways of forgetting. At least, temporarily.  
So Byun Baekhyun decides to do what he does best.

Go out and get wasted.

This time however, he really doesn’t have a fuck in mind when he leaves for a bar some blocks away. The stamen doesn’t want to associate with anyone right now, besides a bottle of whiskey, perhaps.  
_Vodka will do it too_ , he corrects himself.

He starts with cheap beer because it’s the best way to get drowsy and it’s way more affordable than the bottle of exquisite whiskey he had laid his eyes upon.  
He is, however, able to spend some money on whiskey cokes. Or is he having a vodka coke?  
Somewhere along the third glass and the… no he doesn’t remember anymore how many shots he had had, somewhere between then he must have gotten too dizzy to care.  
But this is exactly what he is aiming for.

To drown out the regret, the sorrow.  
Drown out the feeling of his burning tattoo on his back that reminds him of all his mistakes.

But it’s not!!  
Baekhyun is actually proud that he hadn’t said that aloud.  
But _damn_ , it isn’t bloody his fault alone.

Yet, no matter how much he downs, even after another vodka-whiskey or whatever, he still sees those damn eyes.  
He still sees Jongdae standing in front of him, still sees the slacked shoulders, sees the look of utter defeat.  
Sees the tears his best friend had shed because of him.

“Fuck you”, Baekhyun breathes out and nearly gets his drink all over his pants, but he actually manages to catch the glass in time.  
Why can’t he get Jongdae out of his head?

The raven haired knows he can barely even stand, so his ability of speech must be handicapped too, but he tries to talk to the cute pistil girl anyway.  
It’s really not what he had in mind, he swears, but something about Jongdae’s brown eyes is so …unsettling.  
It’s driving him insane. Nuts.  
He just wants his best friend back, he just wants Jongdae back in his arms and he wants the other to hold him and scream at him and to tell him to dye his hair back to pink.  
_He just wants Jongdae_.

When he feels a familiar sting in his left cheek he realises he might have spilled these exact thoughts to the girl he was trying to hit on.  
Needless to say that she poured her fancy looking cocktail on him before leaving the bar all together.

“Fuck”, he breathes out for the utmost time as he slides back into his seat and orders another shot. He doesn’t even specify, he goes with whatever that burns his throat and numbs the yearning of his tattoo.

“If you would have told me, I wouldn’t be here now”, he growls and chugs down the drink.  
He doesn’t even want to think of the bill he has to pay at the end of the night. Or the next morning, whenever he would be ready to pass out.  
Baekhyun wouldn’t be here right now, with his black shirt soaked wet, and his heart and mind a wreck.  
But where would they be instead?  
The stamen can’t say that he knows the answer, though the throbbing of his cherry-tree branch begs to differ.

He ignores it.  
Baekhyun can’t deal with feelings right now. Not when his mind is this clouded, when his limbs tickle in numbness.

Instead, the stamen goes back to his resentment about the whole thing. And how apparently everyone had expected him to know.  
But wouldn’t that make him a worse bastard than he already is now? If he would have toyed with Jongdae’s feelings willingly?

_But he hadn’t known_ , god damn it.

It’s not like Jongdae had treated him any different. Special. They are best friends.  
Of course there is _something_ between them… but not…

Thinking back, maybe he had been special.  
In retrospect, now that Baekhyun was facing shot number ‘I don’t remember plus one’, maybe there had been certain occasions where he _should_ have caught on.  
But never had.

Perhaps, Baekhyun should have been suspicious when the younger never minded that he borrowed his homework. Even calculus work, which the other stamen had worked really hard for.  
But that _is_ a typical best friend thing, is it not?

The black haired released a long breath.  
He knows he is dizzy, feels too many things swirling inside his head, but he tries to remember anyway.  
Anything that could have given it away.

Jongdae’s secret.

It couldn’t have been the extra lunch boxes he brought, back in high school, right?  
They were in different classes, only sharing P.E., but on the days where they had the same lunch break, the younger made sure to bring him a boxed meal.

_But he insisted that his mum made them for me_ , Baekhyun grumbles. Then again, Jongdae has always been a good liar.

He knew which pizza he liked. But… every best friend does.  
Yet, the younger had agreed on sharing the fungi with extra cheese. Jongdae hates mushrooms.  
But he had never complained. Perhaps he should have caught on when his best friend agreed to watch all those horror movies with him, though he was downright scared and usually ended up sleeping in Baekhyun’s bed.  
Perhaps the way the younger held onto him in these nights could have been an indicator.

Perhaps.

Perhaps he should have known when he received his annual valentines chocolate, perfectly wrapped in pink paper.

Perhaps.

Baekhyun lets his head drop onto the counter, welcomes the pain it brings, and curses under his breath. He wants to pull his hair out, strand by strand, but his fingers won’t move.  
He feels numb.

_How dense can you be Byun Baekhyun?_

“You ok, man?”, he hears the voice of the bartender, but chooses to ignore it.  
Apparently, he had always been good in ignoring things.  
In being oblivious.

_How dumb, are you?_

Baekhyun doesn’t realise when he asks for another shot, doesn’t realise he had downed two more.  
But he feels the heavy weight of his phone in his hand and he finds himself yet again lost at what to do.  
He knows what he wants.  
He wants Jongdae, and he wants to apologise.  
He wants to make things right, he wants his best friend back.  
He wants that smile back.

>mm sorry. PLs tak 2 me…………………………<

No answer.

His eyes are fixed on Jongdae’s name, on the words he had just typed out and that probably only made sense to him.  
Why wouldn’t his best friend answer him?

Baekhyun’s skin prickles unpleasantly; it’s not even just his tattoo anymore, no. He feels sick to his stomach, feels the urge to throw up bubble in its pit but the thing he wants most is to fling himself off a bridge.  
His fingers dial the familiar number.

It’s not like he will pick up, Baekhyun muses.  
He is far too drunk to care anyway.

Far too gone to realise he started crying two shots ago, when he realised just how stupid he had been. How much he must have hurt his best friend.

“Dae”, he sobs into his phone. The tears are thick, are hot as they spill down over his cheeks and probably stain the screen on his phone that he presses against his ear.  
“Dae please…”  
He knows he won’t get an answer.  
But he needs this now.  
He needs to let it out, needs some form of ventilation. His heart is such a mess and damn, it hurts.  
Everything hurts and spins and where is Jongdae when he needs him.

“I’m so sorry Dae”, he croaks out  
“I’m so sorry. I’m a- I’m a complete idiot”, his fingers get tangled in his locks and he wishes he could hide somewhere.  
He wishes that …  
That Jongdae was here to hold him.

“I never wanted to-“, he hiccups, “I never wanted to hurt your feelings. You’re…”  
He is what?  
“You’re everything to me and then I hurt you and-“, the hysterical sobs interrupt him, “and I swear I didn’t know. I swear, Jongdae. I would never-“  
Never.  
“I would never hurt you on purpose and now you’re ignoring me and I can’t fucking take it, I-“  
“Where are you?”

Baekhyun’s breath hitches in his throat.  
His eyes open widely and he stares in shock at the counter in front of him.

The stamen’s lips quiver as he tries to form words and eventually rasps out ‘ _Four clovers bar_ ’.  
Is this really…  
Is he really talking to…

“Stay there. I’m coming to get you.”

The call is ended and Baekhyun pulls his phone from his ear so he can look at the screen.  
Look at the name ‘Dae ♥’and at the numbers underneath, indicating that the call had lasted for two minutes and fourteen seconds.

“Fuck”

His heart is pounding against his ribcage, thumping so loudly he is actually scared it might be louder than the music playing in the background.  
He is sure that the remaining people at the bar can hear it.

Baekhyun trembles, everything feels overwhelming in this moment.  
The way Jongdae had sounded so worried about him.

The way he had been left breathless as soon he had heard the voice of his best friend.  
“Fuck”  
New tears spill over his cheeks, as he realises just how bad he has missed the other.  
How utterly happy he feels at these three sentences Jongdae had spoken.  
Baekhyun had never realised how his tattoo, his whole skin, tingles when his best friend talks to him. 

The counter is a mess, he has spilled at least one glass of whatever-coke on it and the tears which keep on coming just make everything more bitter.  
More real.

“Fuck, Baek”  
Said male’s head snaps up immediately and he feels his limbs go wobbly when he spots his best friend next to him.  
A random hoodie on a random pair of jeans, hair dishevelled and slightly wet from either rain or a recent shower.  
Baekhyun had been too preoccupied to mind the weather when he had come here.  
“How much did you drink?”  
His best friend must be eyeing the endless row of glasses around him.  
The mess he made on the hard wood of the bar.

“Not enough to forget what an asshole I am”, he whispers out, lips drawn in a thin line.  
He is completely wasted, but it isn’t enough.  
Jongdae is still in his head.

“Come, I’ve got you”, he hears his best friend whisper and then he feels strong, warm arms around him.  
Money is dropped on the counter, probably to pay his debt, and then he is being pulled outside. Out of the bar, out into the street where the fresh air nearly made him choke in soberness.

_At least, it’s not raining_ , Baekhyun notes as Jongdae pulls him along, down the block.  
Where are they heading? Does the other know where they actually are?  
Baekhyun just stumbles along.

“You’re not an asshole”  
The stamen laughs at the exclamation that was painfully typical for Kim Jongdae.  
“How can you say that?”, he whispers back, utterly broken.  
He is completely out of his mind, and yet Jongdae was here, when he clearly shouldn’t.  
Not when everything Baekhyun ever did was hurt him.

“You’re my best friend, Baek. The _best_ best friend”  
The elder wants to laugh at the irony of it all, but he stays emotionless. At least on the outside.  
“I didn’t know that a best friend is supposed to break the other’s heart”

“It’s fine”, he hears Jongdae sigh in defeat and fuck, the anger comes rushing back in his veins.  
He shoves the younger off, stands his ground on his shaky and unsteady legs  
“No it’s not!”, the black haired screams and holds onto his best friend’s shoulders as his chest heaves  
“It’s not bloody okay. Fuck Jongdae!”, he looks up, meets the other’s gaze and sees nothing but confusion.  
And hurt.  
So much…. Hurt…  
“I fucking broke your heart! Multiple times!”

But Jongdae only smiles. The corners of his mouth turn upwards slightly, but it doesn’t reach his eyes.  
“It’s okay. I’m still alive”, he tries to soothe the elder, but Baekhyun doesn’t want that.  
Doesn’t understand how his best friend can be so calm.  
_How can he smile at me?_

His hands grip the brunet’s shoulder’s tighter, but before he can seriously hurt the younger he lets go and decides to hit his best friend’s chest.  
“Fuck you!”, he sobs loudly, burying his face at Jongdae’s warm neck as he continues to hit the other with his fists.  
There was no real strength in his punches, however.

“How can you say it’s fine!”  
He knows that his tears are staining the younger’s hoodie, but he is too tired to care.  
Too exhausted.  
And Jongdae’s arms around him just feel too good.  
When had the other embraced him? Holding him tightly by his waist?

“You’re drunk, Baek”  
Jongdae’s voice is always so soothing.  
“I know”, he whispers back, but doesn’t move out of the other’s hold.

“Let’s get upstairs okay? You need to sleep. You’ll be hung over tomorrow anyway”  
“Hm”, his eyes are closed, his brain busy with taking in the other stamen’s scent.  
Had Jongdae always smelled like fresh lemons?  
Baekhyun doesn’t know why, but right now he wants to bury his nose at the other’s neck forever.

“Come”, Jongdae gets him out of his trance  
“I can’t carry you up the stairs to the fourth floor. Sorry”, he offers a gentle smile and Baekhyun wonders what those lips would feel like if he kisses them again.

He is really tempted to just lean in and find out, but the younger tugs on his arm and breaks the spell.


	5. Blossoms

 

Jongdae gives him an extra set of sleeping clothes he had stored at the other’s apartment, and offers him the bed.  
Baekhyun stands in front of the piece of furniture and turns back to his best friend.  
His legs are about to give out, but he still stands, holds the brunet’s gaze

“Would it be selfish if I ask you to sleep with me tonight? Next to me?”  
Jongdae doesn’t flinch, doesn’t even blink

“It would”

Baekhyun bites his lower lip

“But I’ll do it anyway”, his best friend whispers and pulls him underneath the cover.  
Pulls him into his arms and strokes over his back.

“Sleep”                    

Baekhyun doesn’t even hear him anymore, because exhaustion had won the better of him.

\--

When the elder opens his eyes again it’s still dark, still before dawn. There are some purple and orange rays painting the horizon of the night sky, but apart from that, everything is still cast into darkness.  
He knows he should still be sleeping, yet something had managed to rouse him.

Baekhyun feels warm, the covers of a familiar bed wrapped around him, but there is something more, something his sleepy mind can’t grasp yet.  
He blinks again, humming as pleasant warmth from another human sips through his skin too.  
 Jongdae, he remembers. He is crashing at his best friend’s place, after that horrible night at the bar, and damn as soon as his thoughts catch up so does his headache.

“Angh…”, there is the noise again that had woken him from his slumber. And damn that smell… it’s thick and heavy in the air, filling his nose and tickling his dazed senses.  
Baekhyun tries to locate it and his eyes wander over the dips and ridges until they settle on the source.  
He needs a double take, needs to blink two times before he looks at his best friend again, who’s lips are slightly parted, and who’s hands grip the duvet tightly.  
What… was going on here?

Jongdae was obviously still asleep, his eyes were closed and he doesn’t give any indication that he is in fact awake.  
Is he dreaming? Baekhyun wonders and is about to reach out and wake the other when the younger stamen bites his lip and releases another deep groan, the fragrance of sweet lemons intensifying by a tenfold at this.

“Mngh fuck… ahh…”  
Okay.  
Baekhyun’s hand is frozen in shock as he realises exactly what kind of dream his best friend was having right there.  
“Don’t tell me you’re gardening in your dreams!”, he wants to scream but it stays a whisper.  
He shakes his head and rolls his eyes playfully.  
It’s not like he doesn’t have those dreams.

At least his dreams end with a petal dance unlike reality.

A bitter lump sits in his throat and he only manages to swallow it after another mewl came from his best friend.  
Should he wake him up? That wouldn’t be a bro thing to do right?  
But…

Baekhyun rubs his temples as the hangover demands attention again.  
“Shit…”, he really needed to sleep more or he would be like a zombie later. And if he can, he really tries to avoid that.  
Meaning, he has to wake the other up, there is no way he can fall asleep again with Jongdae dreaming about…

Oh.  
It dawns on him.  
Jongdae is dreaming about gardening… and… that means he is possibly dreaming about… Baekhyun. Both of them.  
He swallows thickly as mental images start to flow into his hazy mind and he is far too weak to push them out.  
Too tired, and it definitely has nothing to do with the fact that the image is kind of hot.

“Oh lord”, Baekhyun grumbles and massages his temples again before he finally gets a grip on himself and grabs his best friend’s shoulder, shaking him.  
Damn, the other’s skin is flushed too, he realises with wide eyes but what does he expect?

“Dae”, he tries but the other doesn’t stir, just squeezes his eyes together and releases shallow breaths of arousal.  
Baekhyun doesn’t dare to let his eyes travel farther south, doesn’t dare to check if the younger has a boner, because, no they are best friends and he should respect the other’s privacy.

“Jongdae, wake up!”, he nudges the other again and finally the younger opens his eyes  
“Finally”, Baekhyun breathes out a long breath.  
Goosebumps still litter his skin, but he keeps it to himself.  
He is in no position to… say, want, anything to Jongdae.

The brunet’s eyes are wide, and it is obvious that his friend had realised what state he is in when he brings more of the cover over his body and shies away from Baekhyun’s gaze.  
“S-sorry I-“, he stutters, knowing very well that he caused his best friend to feel even more uncomfortable now.  
Way to go Byun Baekhyun. How to ruin everything between you and your best friend? He is your man to get advice from!

“No, it’s okay!”, he needs to make things right.  
Even if his head is pounding so loudly, even if he feels dizzy and he has no idea what to say or do cause his heart had never been that mystified.  
He swallows and reaches out to hold the other around his waist, pulls him closer so they are spooning each other.  
It had been a while since it had been Jongdae needing the consolation.

The black haired stamen feels the younger go rigid under his touch, so he presses a tender kiss to the other’s exposed shoulder, right next to a fragile branch of the magnolia that adorn Jongdae’s sides and his arm. There is a small white bud sitting on the brownish branch and he can watch it quiver at his feather light touch.

So it’s really true… he has that kind of effect on the other and… it feels more real than ever now.  
When he holds the younger closer, when his nose is filled with his favourite fragrance of fresh limes and candies, when he feels Jongdae’s warmth fill him up from within.  
He just hopes it doesn’t make things worse, but after a while he feels his best friend relax a little and melt into his hold.

“It’s okay”, he whispers again and tightens his grasp, wants to show the other that he got him, that everything will be okay in the end.

They fall silent for a minute or two, in which Jongdae’s breath gradually slows down until it has evened out.  Baekhyun is glad that at least this time he seems to have done something right.  
He doesn’t want to cause his best friend… even more heartache.

Still… there is a question lingering on the tip of his tongue and he knows… he knows he needs it off his chest.  
The elder knows he has to ask, but he is scared of the outcome.  
Scared of the answer.  
“Was…”  
He bites his bottom lip and kneads it with his sharp front teeth for a moment before he gathers enough courage to continue  
“Was it about me?”

The question hangs in the air and the raven haired feels the other tense up again so he presses another quick kiss to the shoulder blade  
“I’m sorry”, Baekhyun mumbles  
“It’s just… “  
Jongdae beats him to it. He hears the faint trace of a frustrated chuckle but the younger chokes on it.  
“What do you think?”

_That it was me in your dream_ , Baekhyun wants to say and answer the question, but he keeps mum for now. Let it sink in.

He should do something about it right?  
He really, really should.  
Baekhyun buries his nose at the younger’s nape and drinks in the scent that has always calmed him, always has made him feel better.

Slowly he feels how his headache is reduced to a dull ache that he can ignore if he chooses to. There is a slight tremble that travels through his body as he holds onto the other, his leaves prickling with a feeling of anticipation and contentment.  
Looking back, he has always felt the happiest, the best when in Jongdae’s presence.

There never really has been a moment in his life where he had to survive without his best friend at his side.  
Is it really true that distance makes the heart grow fonder?  
Is it cause he missed the other so much?  
Had he been this blind for all these years that Jongdae had been waiting at the side line?

Baekhyun’s hands grip the younger’s black tank top tighter as an unknown feeling rises in his throat and causes him to choke on the air in his lungs.  
Is it frustration?  
He feels his hands tremble at the force he is using and his fingernails dig into his palms through the fabric, but he can’t stop himself, can’t loosen the grip with which he is holding on.

He knows there are tears tickling his eyelashes and he tries so hard to not let them fall but he can only do so much before a sob rips from his throat and rings through the silent room like a roaring thunder.  
He needs to do something.  
Baekhyun spent years and years doing the wrong things, kept on hurting the one person that never let him down, the one person that…that the elder can’t be without.

“Are you ok-”, he hears the brunet’s voice pipe up, probably inquiring about his sobbing, but this time he is faster.  
This time he has to meet Jongdae half way.  
The raven haired stamen uses the strength he has left in his arms and turns his best friend around, pushes him into the mattress and settles somewhere on his thighs.

It’s painfully obvious now how hard his best friend is.  
The duvet has been kicked far away with his not so graceful spinning move and it leaves Jongdae with a pushed up tank top and a tent in his magenta coloured boxers.  
The dream must have affected him a great deal.  
Baekhyun leans back a little and thinks that yes, it has been him, his dream self that made Jongdae like this.

“Let me help”, he wants to ask but it comes out as an order.  
His best friend’s eyes widen at that and he knows that the other is in a state of complete bewilderment, probably still a bit sleepy, still a bit exhausted and well, more than horny.  
Baekhyun pauses for a moment and takes in the unique scent that is Jongdae’s magnolia and lets his eyes wander over wonderful adorned branches, white buds hiding in between green leaves as they quake with obvious desire to burst and bloom.  
The endorphins must still be flowing through the younger’s veins.

He doesn’t get an answer and that makes him realise the other is still too dumbfounded to understand what he is implying.  
So he brings his hands to the hem of the other’s boxers, not pulling on them, just tugging slightly, looking up and licking his lips not so subconsciously.  
His best friend’s eyes widen in shock a he catches on what the elder hints on.

Baekhyun doesn’t even blink for two more times before a strong hand pushes his own palm away, the other trying to shove him off.  
“I want… to help you, Jongdae”, the elder tries to stay stern, tries to make his point.

This time he is not going to be blind.  
He has opened his eyes and gazes into the same brown chocolate orbs  he has for all these years, has inhaled the same soothing fruity scent that sweeps him of his feet from pale magnolia buds.  
Jongdae has been there all along.  
Next to him and in his heart.  
He was just missing the forest for the trees. When the one that makes him happy, that makes his tattoo tingle and prickle and burst with life has been there, right in front of him.  
“Dae”, he whispers but Jongdae’s gaze is determined as he gets shoved off further

“No, Baekhyun”, the younger grits his teeth and the elder sees the anger flashing up in his eyes.  
“Please don’t”  
Why is the younger pleading him?  
Baekhyun’s eyes travelled up his best friend’s form, trying to ignore the other’s arousal between his thighs and takes in the way Jongdae’s hands tremble.  
Is he about to give in?

“I… don’t wanna be one of the many flowers in your garden”  
Baekhyun’s eyes immediately widened.  
Jongdae thought-  
“No”, the elder says immediately and gets back on the other’s lap, gets their bodies back together and his arms left and right of the brunet’s head.  
His gaze is piercing, unsettling.  
But Jongdae has it all wrong.  
“What if…”, he swallows audibly  
He knows he has to make the other understand. This is his only chance to atone for all those mistakes.  
The black haired stamen smiles a little as he realises yet again how blind he had been.  
When the one who makes your heart beat faster has been there all along.  
He presses his own hard-on against his best friend’s crotch and hears Jongdae gasp.  
“What if I want…”, he leans in closer, their faces mere inches away from each other  
“What if I want to be the only flower in your garden?”

Baekhyun’s heart nearly stills as the younger falls silent for another excruciating moment.  
They are both painfully hard, obviously so as their pricks are pressed together, every small movement causing them to gasp.  
“Do you mean that?”  
The magnolia’s eyes hold insecurity and doubt.  
“Yes”, is the only thing that Baekhyun can answer.  
_Yes, yes , yes a thousand times yes_ is what he actually wants to scream but he is more than sure that it would ruin the moment.  
_Yes, I’m sorry I was a fool and never realised my own feelings, that I never realised that you are the only one I have always wanted._  
How could someone be so blind?  
Why had he needed days, weeks of withdrawal to recognise this?

Jongdae leans up and their lips meet for the first time.  
A tender press of petals, but it leaves them both breathless.  
Baekhyun’s eyes shoot open, he hadn’t even realised he had closed them, as he feels an unfamiliar and very prominent tickle on his back.  
He gasps for air as the feeling doesn’t stop, but only spreads through his whole body. A warm and fuzzy feeling as their hands find each other and their fingers get entwined.  
  
Their gazes meet for a split second.  
It feels like they are spellbound in that moment, feels like everything falls into place suddenly.  
Jongdae squeezes his slimmer hands, and in that instant they both know it’s real.

Their lips meet again, but this time it’s not a hesitant peck.  
It’s far from that as their mouths clash together, loud moans of approval coming from their throats as they keep on giving and taking, Jongdae demanding everything from him.  
Baekhyun whines as the younger pulls away, grinds down his groin as a response to make the other give him back those lips he had wanted to kiss for a while now.  
“Mngh”, the elder watches in delight as the brunet gives in and leans back up to meet him halfway.  
  
Jongdae nibbles on his bottom lip and Baekhyun opens his mouth for the other to take.  
Tongues tangle, and if the raven wouldn’t know better, he would assume that his best friend has far more experience than he lets on.

“Dae”, he breathes between heated kisses, their lips already swollen from all the biting.  
“Baek”, the brunet mimics and wraps his arms around the cherry blossom stamen, tugging at the other to get back to kissing him.  
Baekhyun doesn’t comply though and that earns him a low grunt.  
“Clothes”, he murmurs against curly lips that threaten to conquer his own and the elder can literally watch Jongdae’s brain processing the words until his eyes light up

“I…”, breathing has never been so hard for both of them and the brunet swallows before he continues  
“They have always bothered me. On you”  
Baekhyun flushes, feels even more heat gathering in his cheeks, and curses his overwhelmed self.  
Under normal circumstances he would have a pertinent remark at hand, something about Jongdae’s flirting attempts being embarrassing and feeble, but he is left speechless.  
He inhales two times, gathers his thoughts and lifts himself up, sits on the other’s thighs now and looks down at the magnolia stamen whose buds are already brimming with life.

“I’m only in my underwear”, the black haired says and grabs the hem of his tank top to pull it over his head  
“Quite unnecessary”, he hears Jongdae’s smug reply and feels tempted to just throw the garment of clothing into the other’s face.

Another time maybe.

“Sod off”, he whispers instead and reaches out to get rid of the sleeping top the younger stamen is wearing  
“Off”, he mutters under his breath as Jongdae lifts from the mattress to aid him in his task.  
Top and boxers are gone in the blink of an eye and Baekhyun can’t stop his eyes from roaming over every expanse of skin he is offered.  
Not that he wants to stop.

His eyes settle on the other’s lean stomach, as he watches the rise and fall of Jongdae’s ribcage. It’s a little irregular and Baekhyun commits everything to his memory.  
Because he is the one causing this.  
Jongdae is such a mess because of him, his florets quivering with arousal and the brunet’s muscles tense and flexing underneath his stare.

The cherry tree stamen swallows loudly and follows Jongdae’s gaze down to his own boxers.  
Right.

He gets off of the other’s lap and the bed to be able to shimmy out of the far too tight piece of clothing.  
He has never felt this exposed, has never that willingly shown off his assets.  
But at the same time he feels the most comfortable.  
Jongdae’s look is not judging, is not looking for flaws.  
The younger’s eyes hold affection, longing.  
Not for a quick fuck, not for his magnolias to flourish.  
But longing for Baekhyun, for creating their own piece of Eden together.

The black haired slips back onto the bed and re-settles on Jongdae’s lap, their hard dicks rubbing together for the first time.  
“Fuck”, the elder swears his eyes rolled back for a moment at the slight stimulation and he grips the brunet’s shoulders tighter to not lose focus.

Warm hands settle on his waist and glide down to his hips, offering him the needed reassurance.

“You’re so pretty Baek”, Jongdae let his hands wander over the elder’s sides and Baekhyun shivered under the touch, under the earnest stare his best friend bestowed him with.  
Their naked bodies are pressed together and he feels his cheeks firing up at the words.  
He remembers the incident from six years ago, and closes his eyes at the memory of his stupid young self.  
But he also remembers Jongdae’s warmth, his scent, and these words  
“Am I still the prettiest? Even without…”  
“The prettiest”, Jongdae nods and threads their fingers together  
“Sap”, Baekhyun manages to grin down at the other before they shared another kiss.  
Their mouths plant small kisses on each other’s skin before they find one another again to let their tongues mesh and taste.  
“You’re a real sap, Kim Jongdae”, Baekhyun pulls back and they both hiss as their crotches rub together  
“Nearly forgot about that”, the brunet snickers, but the grin doesn’t reach his eyes as they both have a certain problem to deal with.  
“You’re unbelievable”, Baekhyun grins back and moves down from his best friend’s lap  
“I don’t have any experience like you”  
  
The elder freezes.  
He knows there is no anger in these words, they aren’t meant in any accusing way, but that doesn’t make it hurt less.  
Jongdae had waited for him, while he… had thrown himself at every stamen and pistil that wanted him.  
“I…”  
But Jongdae has already scrambled to his knees, grabbing the elder’s cheeks in his palms

“No”, he shook his head and Baekhyun met his eyes  
“No, I’m sorry Baek. I didn’t mean it like that!”  
“I know”, the elder smiles now  
He does know.  
Jongdae would never… insult him like that.  
Not kind hearted Kim Jongdae.  
He leans up and kisses the other’s lips for good measure  
“Do you have lube? You know I’m not…”  
Baekhyun is not a pistil like Kyungsoo. But never in his life has he wished more for it than in this instant. If he would be able to self-lubricate with stigmatic fluid like them, he would already be bouncing on Jongdae’s hard dick.  
  
“Give me a break”, Jongdae laughs breathlessly  
“I have you naked and willing in front of me and you want me to remember where I store my lube?”  
“It would be most convenient”, Baekhyun nudged the younger back and simpers down at the other as his hand sneaked up a toned thigh and gripped the stamen’s arousal  
“Bastard”, Jongdae hisses as the elder starts to pump him lazily  
Not much pressure, his digits just loosely formed into an o-shape. Baekhyun knows it will make the other even more impatient.  
“Top d-drawer”, the younger rasps out and the raven haired stamen grins as he stops his ministration in favour of getting the lube out.  
He drops it on the bed and ushers the brunet to lean against the head board, before settling between the other’s thighs.  
Jongdae is obviously confused by his actions, but Baekhyun wouldn’t stop now to explain.  
“Baek, what are you ohhh-“  
The younger’s breath gets stuck in his throat as the black haired stamen kisses the tip of the angry red tip of Jongdae’s cock.  
He is so damn tempted to look up and comment on his best friend’s eloquence but he decides against it.  
  
Not now.  
  
Baekhyun circles the tip with his tongue, gathers up all the precum there before he kisses down the shaft, along a vein that leads him to the base.  
Suckling there and keeping his mouth rather busy with driving the younger stamen insane, his right hand fishes for the discarded bottle of lube that comes in handy now.  
He uncaps it with deft fingers and spreads it between his digits without even looking.  
His eyes stay closed as his mouth places open mouthed kisses up the hot flesh back to the tip where he engulfs it.  
“B-baek fuck- what are you-“  
“Are you really asking that?”, the elder had pulled back with a loud _pop_ , his tongue coming out to lick over his reddish lips.  
The stamen uses his left hand to grasps Jongdae’s base and strokes him in languid motions, rendering the younger speechless.  
“Better”, he grins as the brunet only gasps and mewls, and Baekhyun brings his mouth back to his dick, circling the head and tracing down the same vein again.  
His right hand, still coated in lube, moves behind him. It had been a while, but he knows he will be fine.  
He wants to be fine.  
A hiss leaves his throat as he pushes two fingers in at the same time, far too impatient to start with only one.

He knows that the magnolia stamen is watching from underneath his eyelashes, feels those hazel eyes on him, taking in the sight that Baekhyun is offering.  
The elder knows he is being too sloppy, should do this with more precaution, should take more time to work himself open for the other, but he doesn’t want to.  
He wants to feel the burn in a way, Baekhyun wants to feel Jongdae hot and hard inside of him.  
  
“Angh Dae”, he moans as his slim fingers brush closer and closer to his own spot, yet he knows he won’t be able to reach there in the position he is in.  
His knees are spread, left and right of Jongdae’s thighs as he keeps on pushing deeper, adding a third digit far too soon, but not soon enough.  
Baekhyun barely manages to stroke the younger stamen’s cock anymore, but the other’s rapid repetitions of _‘Baek fuck, you’re so hot_ ’ tells him that the other doesn’t really mind and that he is happy enough with the action in front of his eyes.

The cherry blossom stamen grunts and pulls out his fingers before climbing up the brunet’s lap again.  
“Are you su-“  
“Yeah”, Baekhyun breathes against those sweet lips he had bitten plump and red. He knows how close to breaking they are, the heavy scent of Jongdae’s citrus fragrance clouds up his mind already and all he wants is to ride his best friend until they reach oblivion.  
To be honest, Baekhyun doesn’t really know what he is doing, he has never dared to choose this position for fucking in fear of exposing his still sleeping buds.

But this is Jongdae and Jongdae is different.  
Baekhyun doesn’t mind and if all, he wants the other to see and accept him the way he is.  
His delicate fingers wander over the beauty that is Jongdae’s tattoo, on his sides and up to his collarbones and shoulders as he hovers over the younger’s dick.  
The stamen moves and the elder knows he is steading his erection for him so that Baekhyun can just slide down on it as fast or as slowly as he wants to.

And that he does.

“Oh fuck”  
They both moan out at the perfectly tight fit.  
Baekhyun’s thighs quiver as he holds onto the younger stamen, feels the fuzzy tingle of his cherry tree branch taking over his senses for a moment as he tries to adjust.  
It’s not that Jongdae’s dick is overly monstrous or anything.  
But everything feels hot and tight and it stings, of course it does.  
It hurts, despite the lube that his best friend had managed to apply to his prick when the older stamen had been too occupied with following a slender branch up Jongdae’s arm with his tongue and teeth. His journey had ended at the younger’s neck, but his mouth hadn’t rested until he had created at least three dark hickeys.

But it always hurts. It’ a part of the whole procedure and this time Baekhyun more than embraces it.  
He leans forward to seal their lips together, distracting himself for a while as his body gets used to the feeling of his best friend’s cock inside him.  
Jongdae holds him securely, his palms sliding up and down his sides in soothing motions and they don’t separate, don’t pull away till the younger snaps his hips once.

Baekhyun gasps at the jerk and moans instantly when the brunet slips just a little deeper into his body.  
He feels Jongdae’s dick, feels it hard and hot, and it’s so fucking good.  
His skin is on fire and he has to press his forehead to the younger’s shoulder so he can catch his breath.  
And that isn’t easy right now.  
“Fuck”, he mewls out and clings to Jongdae’s neck.  
He holds onto it for dear life as he gets used to the feeling.  
The feeling of being filled which wasn’t unfamiliar to him, but feels so much better this time.  
Is it because this is Jongdae?  
Jongdae he is having sex with?  
His nose is buried at the other’s neck, the side where the brunet’s magnolias meet his collar bones and end in small tips adorned with the white and pretty flower buds.  
Baekhyun swallowed the lump in his throat and retreated slightly, their eyes meeting for a moment before they leaned up to press their lips together.  
Nothing rushed, just a small kiss to sweeten the moment.  
The raven haired reaches out and lets his fingers trail over the tattoo of his best friend. Along the branch that comes up from his arm over the shoulder down to the prominent collarbones that are littered with purplish spots.  
Baekhyun is more than proud of them.

“B-baek”, Jongdae whispers and locks their gazes again  
“Don’t”, he adds and nods to the elder’s hand  
“I… I might burst if you keep on touching them”  
Baekhyun hadn’t even realised he had been stroking over the quivering flowers.  
The scent is overwhelming already, and none of the florets had bloomed yet.  
“Sorry”, he whispers and pulls his hand back, before his lips widen into a big grin.  
He feels better now, feels at ease and ready to move.  
“I’ll take care of that in another way”, he teases with a wink and he knows that Jongdae wants to shove him off and huff, but Baekhyun luckily has the upper hand in this.  
He leans up and brings their mouths together, coaxes the younger’s tongue out to play with his. Their saliva starts to mix again and Baekhyun doesn’t know on what he wants to concentrate the most.  
The fragrance that fills the room, the crisp citrus aroma with the sweet note of floral green that is Jongdae’s magnolia or the feeling of the hot dick inside his hole.  
They separate, their lips moist with spit, and their lungs gasping for air.  
Baekhyun bites his bottom lip as he shifts slightly, drinks in the gasp that Jongdae releases and lifts his bum a little only to drop back down  
“Oh fuck!”, he gapes like a fish without water as he lands back in Jongdae’s lap  
He isn’t even sure if he or the younger had exclaimed such profanities, but it isn’t like he cares right now.  
Because he feels damn good.  
His thighs flex and tense as he uses his strength to raise his body, his hands holding on to Jongdae’s shoulders as he moves again.  
His eyes fall closed as a raw feeling washes over him.

Something tickles and tingles in his veins, but he can’t place the feeling.  
It was new to him, so utterly new and overwhelming as he continues to slowly bounce up and down on Jongdae’s hard dick.  
“D-dae”, he gasps as the brunet grabs his waist to help him move.  
The elder tries to open his eyes, has to blink at least two times before he can focus on the stamen underneath him.  
“Do you feel good?”  
Baekhyun feels like he can barely breathe.  
Jongdae’s dick is sliding in and out of his hole, and it feels so raw, he feels every vein and every nook of the hot flesh inside of him.  
It just feels so _intense_ , like never before.

Had sex ever felt like that?  
Baekhyun thinks that the answer is no.

The brunet’s hair is sticking to his sweaty forehead and he seems to need a moment to gather his thoughts, too.  
“Y-yeah. F-fuck Baek”, he whispers, ends with a low moan as Baekhyun plops back down on his erection.  
  
The stamen feels the other’s arousal twitch inside him, feels it throb as it breeches his walls again and again, their pace getting faster as they both grew more impatient.  
The ride was slippery, but Baekhyun wouldn’t want it any other way.  
He wants it exactly like this.  
His fingernails digging into pale skin, leaving red crescents in their wake.  
Baekhyun’s back arching in a perfect c-shape as Jongdae’s dick hit a special spot inside him.  
“So good, D-dae, angh fuck, fuck me harder”  
His nerves are on fire, everything feels hot and Jongdae has him filled to the brim with every _down_ , the friction so mind-numbingly good with every _up_.

“Baek”, Jongdae tries to get his attention, but he doesn’t want to listen.  
He wanted to cum.  
He wanted to cum so bad.  
His mind was lost with the feeling of being full, with the other’s scent all around him and filling the room.  
Whenever he opened his eyes, he saw a white bud opening up, releasing another puff of the fragrance that made everything even more real.  
Even better.  
More arousing.  
“Fuck”, Baekhyun says again and brings their foreheads together  
His legs are straining, the muscles in his thighs would hate him tomorrow but maybe Jongdae would kiss it better.  
“Oh fuck”, he says again as he imagines Jongdae’s mouth worshipping his legs.  
“I-I”, he tries to form a full sentence but he is interrupted by hot lips that meet his.  
He moans into Jongdae’s mouth, lets his cavern get plundered by a bold tongue again before he manages to pull away  
“I… will always think of sex now, when I…smell you”  
Baekhyun is so damn close already.  
His muscles are burning, his skin is so damn hot and his back feels like someone poured hot wax down his shoulders to his bum.  
“S-shut up, will you!”  
Jongdae nudged him and brought him down harder, filling him deeper, hitting his prostate dead-on.  
“Oh fuck, do that again”, he moans out, his tattoo tingling with pure desire, raw lust.  
Love.

Jongdae tries to comply, tries to keep the angle with his hips in which Baekhyun and him are working, but the elder knows he will reach his limit soon.  
He won’t be able to go on for much longer, but he also doesn’t want to ask Jongdae to take over.  
He wants to cum like this.  
Not with his back pressed into the mattress.  
With Jongdae, his best friend, Baekhyun is not ashamed.  
He isn’t scared.

“I-I … I’m so close”, he admits and Jongdae only nods.  
There are so many white magnolias on his skin, in full bloom and looking so damn beautiful as they unfold on the younger’s skin.  
And it was because of Baekhyun.  
He was Jongdae’s first.  
The first to make him bloom, and fuck, this turns him on even more.  
Even more than the skin slapping sounds, than the feeling of his best friend’s balls against his butt cheeks as he moves down, more than anything.  
Because Jongdae is blooming for him, showing him his glory.  
And Baekhyun is selfish.  
He doesn’t want to share the sight ever.

“Me too”, he hears his partner in crime and plants a promise of imminent paradise on the other’s lips.  
It feels different.  
From the beginning it has been different.  
The kisses feel strange, they are filled with something he had never poured in before.  
Real affection?  
The way Jongdae holds him is different.  
There will be marks on him tomorrow yes, the younger’s hands grabbing his waist tightly but it is not out of aggression.  
They are signs that the other doesn’t want to let go.  
And this…  
He inhales deeply as he makes his thighs work again, lifts himself and feels Jongdae’s cock slip out of him.  
This feels different the most.  
He has never felt… that overwhelmed.  
His tattoo had never tingled that much, had never bubbled in arousal like it is now.  
“I-I… I’m about to cum Dae, please, harder”, he drops down and knows he won’t be of much help anymore.  
The younger is doing his best to make them both reach their climax, works his hips as good as he can underneath the elder stamen.  
It surely isn’t easy but that is not was Baekhyun was focusing on right now.  
Instead, he concentrates on the feeling of his hole being pushed open, of the sensation that comes with the rocking of their hips, or their groins.  
His arms come up again and wrap around Jongdae’s neck, holding onto the other.  
He feels powerless already, his thighs trembling as he knows he is about to cum.  
“D-dae”, he groans, squeezed the other’s dick inside him as good as he can  
“Baek- I- I- I’m about to b-“

But before the younger can finish his sentence, before Jongdae can cum, Baekhyun’s nerves give in and he topples over the edge himself.  
There had been a desperate thrust upward from the younger and it brushed his insides just right, just the way it drives him nuts and then-  
“Mngh Dae, Dae. Dae!”  
A wave of heat washes over him, starts at his lower back and spreads over his back to his shoulders

And suddenly he knows what is happening.  
Baekhyun uses his last strength to ride himself through his orgasm, feels his toes curl and his eyes roll back as the endorphins surge through his veins, his load staining their tummies in creamy white ribbons.  
He knows what’s happening.  
He feels it.  
Feels it spread and grow and… bloom!

Baekhyun feels the branches grow over his back, feels the tiny pink flowers grow out of the wood and bursting open instantly.  
His nape and his shoulders are decorated in pretty pink in the next second and he opens his eyes to gaze into Jongdae’s widened ones.  
“Fuck”, it burns.  
It itches.  
But it feels so bloody good he isn’t sure if he just experiences a multiple orgasm.  
“Baek you-“  
“Shut up”, Baekhyun says immediately and tries to shut off his over-sensitivity.  
He wants Jongdae to cum too.  
Wants to feel the other’s seed inside his body.  
“Shut up and- cu-cum”, he clenches his walls as best as he can, lets Jongdae thrust up into him and takes it the best he can.  
“Cum”, he beseeches the other and crashes their lips together, pries them open without hesitation and starts a war of tongues.  
 He feels Jongdae’s body convulse under him, feels the brunet’s hips stutter and his thighs quiver, and then finally, his gasps get too much and they have to separate as Jongdae all but moans and whines loudly  
“Baek, Baek!”, they had shifted on the bed, Jongdae not against the head board anymore, and so he can plop backwards, taking Baekhun with him, his hand raking up the elder’s back.  
It rips a loud mewl from the stamen as the brunet’s rough hands glide over his freshly grown sakura tree tattoo, strokes over the many pink florets that were littered over his pale skin.

It takes Jongdae two more thrusts up into the black haired’s body to burst.  
The magnolias on his sides explode and release their beauty all at once, but Baekhyun is pressed to close to watch them unfold.  
His eyes are closed, his body exhausted, tired out, but the feeling of the other’s cum in him…  
It’s worth it.  
Worth the oversensitive feeling he had endured.  
“Fuck”, he hears Jongdae hiss.  
They both try to catch their breath, clinging to one another in a desperate attempt to hold on.

“I… I…”, Baekhyun is still too lost to form coherent sentences. But something has happened to him, he can feel it, feels the new branches fresh and hot on his skin and the millions of little cherry blossoms tickling him.  
He lies on top of his best friend, not able to move, not wanting to move as he lets the sensation settle.  
There is a fragrance of green in the air, a mellow green aroma mixed with the sweetness of a faint rose.

Jongdae had made him…  
  
“You… bloomed”, Jongdae finishes for him.

The other’s eyes are big and when Baekhyun looks up to meet them he can see the surprise, the disbelief reflecting in them.  
The black haired stamen suddenly feels bare und vulnerable underneath Jongdae’s piercing gaze, his orbs wandering over his pink and green covered shoulder’s and probably down his backside that the younger can catch a glimpse of thanks to their position.  
Baekhyun’s own face is still pressed onto the brunet’s chest and it’s so unsettling, so nerve-racking to know that his back is on full display to the other.

All the years he had been trying, all the times he failed and felt ashamed of his excuse of a small branch that decorated his skin.  
Not even a single bud, a single floret had been produced, but here he was, Jongdae’s dick still inside him and he feels, he knows, that all of his back, up to his shoulders and his sides are inked in a perfect sakura cherry tree.

He smells them, and knows that his scent causes Jongdae to lose his composure because each time the other inhales a little too deeply he shudders, trembles, and holds him just a little tighter.  
Baekhyun feels them.  
Every limb, every leaf, every blossom that thrived because…  
Because of Jongdae.

The black haired frees himself from the other’s grip, flinches slightly when he feels the younger’s organ still inside him, but he pushes the feeling aside in favour of mashing their lips together.  
He should feel cold after his orgasm had toned down, but he doesn’t.

Baekhyun feels warm, high on their mixed fragrances of fruity lemons and sweet hay.  
Jongdae’s mouth opens without protest, and the elder doesn’t hesitate to bring their tongues together and force the other into a tangle of wet muscles.  
He swears that his best friend suddenly tastes sweeter, better than ever, but he is probably being biased.

“I love you”, he breathes, chest heaving when they part.  
His lips are glistening with their mixed saliva and he runs his tongue over them to savour the taste.  
“I…”  
He wants to say sorry, wants to apologise again for being a fool, a real idiot, a bastard who actually doesn’t deserve Jongdae.  
However, he cannot continue as the younger presses a finger onto his swollen lips.

“I love you too”, Jongdae whispers and Baekhyun nearly moans out in bliss as the younger’s lips curl into that special smile he had missed for far too long.  
It’s honest this time and the dark haired stamen feels his heart flutter at the sight.  
His blossoms tingle in rapture and he wonders if it has always been like that.

If his cherry blossoms had always waited for this moment, when Baekhyun breaks out of this spell of idiocy, of denial to see the real thing.  
The real deal.  
Jongdae, who had always held his heart.

“We make a pretty garden, don’t you think?”  
The brunet’s arms hold him loosely around his waist now and Baekhyun knows that he has never felt better in his life.  
He hears the weaved in pride in the younger’s voice and usually he would give a snide remark just because he can but this time, just this time he keeps quiet.

There is a gentle hand caressing his newborn flowers and he quivers a little at the touch.  
It’s like his tattoo is reacting to Jongdae, its’ creator of some sort and Baekhyun hopes that his best friend won’t catch on about how much power he holds over him now.  
With just that simple touch.

Baekhyun is more than grateful that the younger doesn’t comment on anything else.  
That he doesn’t have to utter corny things like ‘ _I guess I have always been waiting for this garden to happen, but I have been too blind to see_ ’.  
Jongdae had always been able to read him.

His dark eyes travel over an opened magnolia flower that adorns the brunet’s collarbone.  
It’s beautiful, alluring and so damn attractive.  
Baekhyun places a gentle kiss on the blossom and smirks smugly when he feels the other stamen tremble underneath him.  
So he wasn’t the only one easily affected by this.  
“ I do”, he grins up at his best friend and presses their lower halves together, the feeling of Jongdae’s soft dick inside him strangely arousing.

His tongue flicks out and over the inked flower, over the white petals where he nips and pulls at the flesh, down to a branch that crosses the bump of the younger’s collarbone which he follows with his mouth now.  
Baekhyun bites down when he finds a spot of skin that pleases him and relishes the loud groan that escapes Jongdae’s throat.

“But, I’m contemplating to expand said garden a-s-a-p”, the smirk is still in place as he looks up and meets his best friend’s fiery gaze.  
He loves to tease and Jongdae is more than vulnerable to it, it seems.  
Baekhyun doesn’t even yelp when the brunet flips them around and pulls out unceremoniously, he only spreads his legs and lets the other litter his chest with kisses.  
His heart is thumping heavily against his ribs and it feels so damn good, so thrilling as the smell of their created garden intensifies again.  
When the younger is kissing down the flat planes of his stomach, reaching lower and lower Baekhyun growls and nudges his best friend up to meet him in a longing kiss of lazy tongues.

It has always been Jongdae in his life.

He plants another ‘ _sorry_ ’ onto the brunet’s lips that gets washed away by multiples ‘ _it doesn’t matter as long as you are mine now_ ’.  
  
Baekhyun finds his home in all too familiar arms, and it can’t be better.

\--

They do talk about it later.  
Later, meaning after they had showered together, had sucked each other off underneath the cascading water and tumbled into the living room with wet hair and towels around their waists.  
  
Baekhyun had wanted to apologise again, but Jongdae reassures him that he had always known that the elder hadn’t done it on purpose.  
They all know how dense he could be.  
He apologises regardless, but he knows that the younger isn’t listening.  
Jongdae is too busy with tracing over his newly spread cherry tree tattoo that was now painted across his whole back.

It tickles, the tattoo immediately reacting to the younger’s touch, and Baekhyun wants to curse as he swears that his flowers want to appeal to the other with an extra whiff of rosy fragrance.  
“Traitors”, he growls and moans at the same time as he feels Jongdae kissing one of his pinkish florets  
“They love me”, the younger concludes and Baekhyun can hear the curly smile forming on his lover’s features  
“Yeah… we do”

**> Fin< **

**A/N:**  
_I can’t believe this is finally over.  
And I have no idea how I even managed to write 24k about blooming BaekChen.  
This wouldn’t have been possible without my dearest L.  
Thank you.  
  
Thank you for all the support!  
  
xoxo Light_Voltage_


End file.
